harder to come back then i thought

okay so now you can all really, really yell at me....go ahead, i'll wait....

out of your system? good....i can't have my blog readers mad at me!

well i really truly have written blog posts- and then never published them. not because i didn't want to, but because i got lazy and forgot all about them. so where are these blog posts? well, i'm not sure if they are really relavent right now- and i just thought why post them.... so i decided to write a new post about random things that have been going on.....very random

okay, so i recently graduated in december with my undergraduate degree in Art Therapy- WOW......excited and relieved doesn't even begin to describe how i feel....i have been working on this degree for 4 1/2 years...so much has gone into that degree- laughter, worry, tears, smiles, growth...growth beyond anything i could have ever forseen for myself. college is not just about the degree- it's also about everything in between...i know that now, i just wished i had known that then..... so now that i'm done with one degree i may just be crazy enough to go back for another- why you ask? because i just don't feel fufilled...i need more- i went back to school yesterday with erin (best friend ever...) and sat in on her photography class- i realized that i missed that, i missed sitting there and soaking in the teacher, the room, my desk, my classmates....i missed it all. this my dear friends is how i know i am not done with my education, not by a long shot- i am going to go back...i'll go back until it's enough- when will that be, i don't know...stay tuned

hmmmm another thing- i have been working at my job now almost full time....and it's been kind of, well, anti-climatic- really, do i really work here? i do like where i work- i just feel that i am meant to do something more challenging....much much more challenging....so if i find something more fufilling then i will accept it, welcome it even- and if not then i will wait to see what more schooling will bring- something is going to happen, i can feel it i'm just not sure what it is yet....i used to dread not knowing, however i LOVE that feeling now- i love not knowing, that is what makes life worth living..

also on the job front i am still working for Molly over at mthreestudio- which i am completely excited about!!! this job i absolutely LOVE.....assisting one of the best photographers in milwaukee is awesome....AWESOME!!! i love helping Molly capture a couples special day, every couple is different and that is what makes this job so great.... i am very excited for wedding season 2009..bring it on!!!!

hmmm let me think...there are other things but it's best to leave somethings for other posts no?

i will leave you all with this- i have been thinking a lot lately, i guess not just thinking but growing- changing and really looking at my life. i love life and i really am exploring what i'm supposed to be doing with it.... trust me, this exploration does not come easy- and i don't think it's suppposed to. however don't worry about me, this is an exciting adventure- i love this ride, i don't know where it will take me, but it will be so worth it....

and i know i said that was my last thing..however i have one more for you- a friend tuned me in to one of the most beautiful songs i think i have ever heard....i love it so i thought i would share.... the song is called beautiful mess by Jason Mraz.

i will leave you with the lyrics, please come back- i promise to write more soon!

You've got the best of both worlds
You're the kind of girl who can take down a man,
And lift him back up again
You are strong but you're needy,
Humble but you're greedy
And based on your body language,
And shoddy cursive I've been reading
Your style is quite selective,
Though your mind is rather reckless
Well I guess it just suggests
That this is just what happiness is

And what a beautiful mess this is
It's like picking up trash in dresses

Well it kind of hurts when the kind of words you write
Kind of turn themselves into knives
And don't mind my nerve you could call it fiction
But I like being submerged in your contradictions dear
'Cause here we are, here we are

Although you were biased I love your advice
Your comebacks they're quick
And probably have to do with your insecurities
There's no shame in being crazy,
Depending on how you take these
Words I'm paraphrasing this relationship we're staging

And what a beautiful mess this is
It's like picking up trash in dresses

Well it kind of hurts when the kind of words you say
Kind of turn themselves into blades
And kind and courteous is a life I've heard
But it's nice to say that we played in the dirt oh dear
Cause here we are, Here we are
Here we are [x7]
We're still here
What a beautiful mess this is
It's like taking a guess when the only answer is yes

Through timeless words, and priceless pictures
We'll fly like birds, out of this earth
And times they turn, and hearts disfigure
But that's no concern when we're wounded together
And we tore our dresses, and stained our shirts
But it's nice today, oh the wait was so worth it.

a new begining

anyone still out there?

sorry dear blog readers for the extremely looooooooooooong abscence! i have been crazy busy with life, school, and work- all things i will recap once this semester is over!

1 more week and i will have completed my undergraduate degree.....1 MORE WEEK?!?!?!

it's amazing how time flies. today i was sitting in class thinking of all the memories i will take away from Mount Mary. i would love to write them all right here, right now, but that will have to wait until after my final paper is complete! MY FINAL PAPER!

do i sound too excited in this post? that's because i am my friends!

stay tuned for an obscence amount of posts within the next week or so!

hope everyone had a fantastic Thanksgiving!

to my husbaand

"I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;so I love you because I know no other way
than this: where I does not exist, nor you,so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep."
-Pablo Neruda

more to come

so my dear blog readers i promise i will be coming back on soon with A LOT of updated info- too much to write right now seeing as i have midterms and a TON of homework. i promise i will update soon though! hopefully with some fabulous pics!

i hope all of you are doing fabulous. remember, just because i am not posting doesn't mean i am not reading your blogs! i am well versed on all the happenings!

i will leave you with a fabulous picture- hopefully this will tide you over till i write again :0)

i present to you the weirdest pictures we took on our trip to san fran....

D by some weird bee thing..... i think it was a fast food restaurant, and of course he is doing his weird signature hand thing....


this is my new friend MUNI- yes i now collect these weird creatures and they are actually pretty cool :0) very popular in san fran

i need a wish right now

so as i was dragging myself out of bed this morning i was thinking about our trip to san francisco- as i do frequently everday of my life because it was sooooo the best trip.....EVER....

so as i was thinking about our trip i remember the ever popular wishing fountain that we passed on one of our many walks through the city. we decided to try our luck and throw some pennies in the wishing fountain- together, hand in hand.



i guess what this post is all about is that fact that right about now i would like to cash in on some of those wishes we made- not that everything is going too entirely horrible here but it would be nice to have some exciting and re-energizing happen. school, work, life, has put us both in a little bit of a funk lately- hopefully that all changes soon and we win the lottery..... but i won't be picky, a wish granted is a wish granted :0)

so i hope that you all have wishes, what are they? please feel free to post them or think of them today- we could all use a little luck, yes? :0)

is this thing on?

bad blogger, bad, bad, bad blogger..............

so i've been MIA for a while and i'll tell you why- really it's not a good excuse, i just didn't have time for blogging (gasp!). now before all of you get angry at me for not having enough time for blogging, something i truly love and would do at least once or twice a week no matter what crazy thing was happening in my life (before now that is), i just have to say there has been a lot of change around the Dubinsky household. i will try to sum things up short and sweet- and in list form because i just can't resist a good list :0)

- darin and i traveled to the wondrous and beautiful land of San Francisco- i tell you guys there is NOTHING more beautiful, at least nothing we have seen yet- San Francisco was by far one of the most laid back, gorgeous, and EXPENSIVE cities we have ever been too in our married existence. it truly was one of the best times we have ever had. we were able to relax and truly remember what was important- not bills, money (or lack there of), not school, work, or even drama with friends or family- nope it was each other, our marriage and remembering why we had even come to san francisco in the first place- OUR 1 YEAR WEDDING ANNIVERSARY! yep, we have been married for a year already! can you guys believe it? we sure couldn't! i am glad that we took this time with each other, to truly appreciate one another and how much we love each other, and always, always will. so without further ado, here are some lovely snapshots of our trip :0)

this is hubby and i in front of the golden gate bridge- the picture does not do it justice, this bridge was absolutely GORGEOUS! it was one of our favorite parts of the trip!


this is me enjoying one of my many glasses of Sangria- D thought i should have all the garnish, i believe we were a little intoxicated at the time- but hey, who cares? we're on vacation!


Pier 39 was kind of a tourist trap- but the seals were awesome!!!! they were so cute, and so adorable i just couldn't stop staring at them! :0)


these are our new friends that we met in the Castro District of San Francisco. If you didn't know the Castro District prides itself on being one of the most open and accepting districts in San Francisco of Gay and Lesbian couples. Darin and i absolutely loved hanging out in the castro, the people were friendly, courteous, and more than willing to help a couple of tourists! we ended up meeting these guys at bar called Twin Peaks- it was actually the day of our anniversary so they bought us a drink and we watched Michael Phelps kick some olympic ass!


Another awesome thing about the castro? Hot Cookie! This place had the most amazing cookies....EVER! Besides cookies they also sold underwear that said "HOT COOKIE" on them- if you bought one you could model them and get your picture on the wall- no matter how much i tried to get hubby to model the "HOT" undies he just wouldn't do it- so alas no underwear pic on the walls of San Fran for us!

i have more pictures that i will definately share later- i would hate to use them all up on one post! then again we did take about 600 pics..... yea we are definately freaks with the camera!

- another big milestone in our lives is that i am back in school.....AND SO IS DARIN! i am soooooo proud of my hubby! he started school to become an Anesthesiology Technician! he is really enjoying it, i can tell he will really like being in school again! he is sooooooo much happier with a new job, and a new outlook on life! we get to spend more time together, have dinner together like a regular couple, and actually be home on the same days!

- i got offered a position by the current company i am working for. i have been offered this position a couple of times and i finally decided to bite. why you ask? well because when i really thought about it, i didn't have a plan after i graduate this semester. i love where i work- i love the people, the hours, and the workload isn't entirely too bad. this isn't to say i don't want to move on- but i don't want to move on right now. i want to concentrate on making some money, figure out if i want to go to grad school, and then make my decision. i am 23 years old and not really in any rush. this is a good chance for me to move up in my company, gain a little more job experience, and also make some more money- which is a plus to taking this position! :0)another plus is that i will be getting HEALTH INSURANCE!!!!! which is a huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge factor! i can't wait to have health insurance and rest a little easier at night!

-hubby and i are getting sooooooooooooo much closer to paying off our debt! i can not wait to be debt free- then we can finally start saving for the future and putting our money towards important things- like a mortgage maybe? :0)

- and lastly hubby and i have been talking about TTC- not right this second but in the future. we have a few more things we needed to map out mapped out and we finally feel good about our plans. i just recently purchased the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" which i have heard awesome things about- i can't wait to start reading!

So things are a little hectic, but at the same time soooooooooo amazing! I feel like we are finally headed in the right direction!

i have been reading my blog list religiously still so i am well caught up on what you are all up to! now you can hopefully catch up with me- i promise the next absence won't be so long!

hope everyone had a great labor day!!!! look for more posts soon!

roughest two weeks....ever

so i have definately had the roughest two weeks that i have had in a long time.... i am completely beat! i didn't realize just how many hours i put in until i did- 50 last week, and 50 this week- i say goodbye to my overtime after tomorrow which i have to say i am glad to do! it's been nice making extra money, but in the end when your too tired to do ANYTHING the money kind of looses it's appeal.

so what else has been going on with me you might ask? well, to be honest, not much- i have been working, sleeping, eating....repeat- but in my slightly spare time there have been a few things accomplished, which i have to contribute to hubby stepping it up a notch while i am working these long hours! he has had dinner ready every night when i come home, he has been cleaning, doing laundry, and giving me much needed pep talks via email and text message while i am at work :0)

what we have been really focusing on is our trip to San Francisco! It is only a week away- we leave August 5th and return on August 13th- this trip is a DREAM COME TRUE! we both need this getaway sooooooo much- it is going to help us both relax and get ready for what is to come when we return- there are A LOT of things on the agenda- and not a lot of time to do them.....

- hubby will hopefully (fingers crossed) be registering for some college courses! i am soooo proud of him and excited!

- hubby will also be getting a new job- something that can work around a school schedule and also work around us- we hardly get to spend time with each other and that will hopefully all be changing very soon :0)

- i am gearing up for my last semester of college, yep you heard it right- my final semester EVER in college- well at least until i decide whether or not i will be going to grad school.

- i may be taking a job with my current company that would offer me more money as well as health benefits- something as you all know hubby and i desperately need. i posted an earlier blog a long time ago about not wanting to accept this position, but after careful thought i decided right now it is the best decision- other things will come along and when they do i will be ready for them, right now i am ready for this.

so that is about it- all the updates in a list form, because you know how i love lists :0)

oh, and another thing, why is Dark Knight so incredibly hard to see? hubby and i tried to see it on Sunday, but to no avail it was completely sold out- i am hearing good things so i hope we get to see it this weekend.

well that is all for now- my blogging will pick up after a long weekend of rest and relaxation- i need it!