anyone still out there?
sorry dear blog readers for the extremely looooooooooooong abscence! i have been crazy busy with life, school, and work- all things i will recap once this semester is over!
1 more week and i will have completed my undergraduate degree.....1 MORE WEEK?!?!?!
it's amazing how time flies. today i was sitting in class thinking of all the memories i will take away from Mount Mary. i would love to write them all right here, right now, but that will have to wait until after my final paper is complete! MY FINAL PAPER!
do i sound too excited in this post? that's because i am my friends!
stay tuned for an obscence amount of posts within the next week or so!
hope everyone had a fantastic Thanksgiving!
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Sunday, November 9, 2008
to my husbaand
"I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,in secret, between the shadow and the soul.
I love you as the plant that never blooms but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.
I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;so I love you because I know no other way
than this: where I does not exist, nor you,so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep."
-Pablo Neruda
I love you as the plant that never blooms but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.
I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;so I love you because I know no other way
than this: where I does not exist, nor you,so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep."
-Pablo Neruda
Monday, October 6, 2008
more to come
so my dear blog readers i promise i will be coming back on soon with A LOT of updated info- too much to write right now seeing as i have midterms and a TON of homework. i promise i will update soon though! hopefully with some fabulous pics!
i hope all of you are doing fabulous. remember, just because i am not posting doesn't mean i am not reading your blogs! i am well versed on all the happenings!
i will leave you with a fabulous picture- hopefully this will tide you over till i write again :0)
i present to you the weirdest pictures we took on our trip to san fran....
D by some weird bee thing..... i think it was a fast food restaurant, and of course he is doing his weird signature hand thing....
this is my new friend MUNI- yes i now collect these weird creatures and they are actually pretty cool :0) very popular in san fran
i hope all of you are doing fabulous. remember, just because i am not posting doesn't mean i am not reading your blogs! i am well versed on all the happenings!
i will leave you with a fabulous picture- hopefully this will tide you over till i write again :0)
i present to you the weirdest pictures we took on our trip to san fran....
D by some weird bee thing..... i think it was a fast food restaurant, and of course he is doing his weird signature hand thing....
this is my new friend MUNI- yes i now collect these weird creatures and they are actually pretty cool :0) very popular in san fran
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
i need a wish right now
so as i was dragging myself out of bed this morning i was thinking about our trip to san francisco- as i do frequently everday of my life because it was sooooo the best trip.....EVER....
so as i was thinking about our trip i remember the ever popular wishing fountain that we passed on one of our many walks through the city. we decided to try our luck and throw some pennies in the wishing fountain- together, hand in hand.
i guess what this post is all about is that fact that right about now i would like to cash in on some of those wishes we made- not that everything is going too entirely horrible here but it would be nice to have some exciting and re-energizing happen. school, work, life, has put us both in a little bit of a funk lately- hopefully that all changes soon and we win the lottery..... but i won't be picky, a wish granted is a wish granted :0)
so i hope that you all have wishes, what are they? please feel free to post them or think of them today- we could all use a little luck, yes? :0)
so as i was thinking about our trip i remember the ever popular wishing fountain that we passed on one of our many walks through the city. we decided to try our luck and throw some pennies in the wishing fountain- together, hand in hand.
i guess what this post is all about is that fact that right about now i would like to cash in on some of those wishes we made- not that everything is going too entirely horrible here but it would be nice to have some exciting and re-energizing happen. school, work, life, has put us both in a little bit of a funk lately- hopefully that all changes soon and we win the lottery..... but i won't be picky, a wish granted is a wish granted :0)
so i hope that you all have wishes, what are they? please feel free to post them or think of them today- we could all use a little luck, yes? :0)
Monday, September 1, 2008
is this thing on?
bad blogger, bad, bad, bad blogger..............
so i've been MIA for a while and i'll tell you why- really it's not a good excuse, i just didn't have time for blogging (gasp!). now before all of you get angry at me for not having enough time for blogging, something i truly love and would do at least once or twice a week no matter what crazy thing was happening in my life (before now that is), i just have to say there has been a lot of change around the Dubinsky household. i will try to sum things up short and sweet- and in list form because i just can't resist a good list :0)
- darin and i traveled to the wondrous and beautiful land of San Francisco- i tell you guys there is NOTHING more beautiful, at least nothing we have seen yet- San Francisco was by far one of the most laid back, gorgeous, and EXPENSIVE cities we have ever been too in our married existence. it truly was one of the best times we have ever had. we were able to relax and truly remember what was important- not bills, money (or lack there of), not school, work, or even drama with friends or family- nope it was each other, our marriage and remembering why we had even come to san francisco in the first place- OUR 1 YEAR WEDDING ANNIVERSARY! yep, we have been married for a year already! can you guys believe it? we sure couldn't! i am glad that we took this time with each other, to truly appreciate one another and how much we love each other, and always, always will. so without further ado, here are some lovely snapshots of our trip :0)
this is hubby and i in front of the golden gate bridge- the picture does not do it justice, this bridge was absolutely GORGEOUS! it was one of our favorite parts of the trip!
this is me enjoying one of my many glasses of Sangria- D thought i should have all the garnish, i believe we were a little intoxicated at the time- but hey, who cares? we're on vacation!
Pier 39 was kind of a tourist trap- but the seals were awesome!!!! they were so cute, and so adorable i just couldn't stop staring at them! :0)
these are our new friends that we met in the Castro District of San Francisco. If you didn't know the Castro District prides itself on being one of the most open and accepting districts in San Francisco of Gay and Lesbian couples. Darin and i absolutely loved hanging out in the castro, the people were friendly, courteous, and more than willing to help a couple of tourists! we ended up meeting these guys at bar called Twin Peaks- it was actually the day of our anniversary so they bought us a drink and we watched Michael Phelps kick some olympic ass!
Another awesome thing about the castro? Hot Cookie! This place had the most amazing cookies....EVER! Besides cookies they also sold underwear that said "HOT COOKIE" on them- if you bought one you could model them and get your picture on the wall- no matter how much i tried to get hubby to model the "HOT" undies he just wouldn't do it- so alas no underwear pic on the walls of San Fran for us!
i have more pictures that i will definately share later- i would hate to use them all up on one post! then again we did take about 600 pics..... yea we are definately freaks with the camera!
- another big milestone in our lives is that i am back in school.....AND SO IS DARIN! i am soooooo proud of my hubby! he started school to become an Anesthesiology Technician! he is really enjoying it, i can tell he will really like being in school again! he is sooooooo much happier with a new job, and a new outlook on life! we get to spend more time together, have dinner together like a regular couple, and actually be home on the same days!
- i got offered a position by the current company i am working for. i have been offered this position a couple of times and i finally decided to bite. why you ask? well because when i really thought about it, i didn't have a plan after i graduate this semester. i love where i work- i love the people, the hours, and the workload isn't entirely too bad. this isn't to say i don't want to move on- but i don't want to move on right now. i want to concentrate on making some money, figure out if i want to go to grad school, and then make my decision. i am 23 years old and not really in any rush. this is a good chance for me to move up in my company, gain a little more job experience, and also make some more money- which is a plus to taking this position! :0)another plus is that i will be getting HEALTH INSURANCE!!!!! which is a huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge factor! i can't wait to have health insurance and rest a little easier at night!
-hubby and i are getting sooooooooooooo much closer to paying off our debt! i can not wait to be debt free- then we can finally start saving for the future and putting our money towards important things- like a mortgage maybe? :0)
- and lastly hubby and i have been talking about TTC- not right this second but in the future. we have a few more things we needed to map out mapped out and we finally feel good about our plans. i just recently purchased the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" which i have heard awesome things about- i can't wait to start reading!
So things are a little hectic, but at the same time soooooooooo amazing! I feel like we are finally headed in the right direction!
i have been reading my blog list religiously still so i am well caught up on what you are all up to! now you can hopefully catch up with me- i promise the next absence won't be so long!
hope everyone had a great labor day!!!! look for more posts soon!
so i've been MIA for a while and i'll tell you why- really it's not a good excuse, i just didn't have time for blogging (gasp!). now before all of you get angry at me for not having enough time for blogging, something i truly love and would do at least once or twice a week no matter what crazy thing was happening in my life (before now that is), i just have to say there has been a lot of change around the Dubinsky household. i will try to sum things up short and sweet- and in list form because i just can't resist a good list :0)
- darin and i traveled to the wondrous and beautiful land of San Francisco- i tell you guys there is NOTHING more beautiful, at least nothing we have seen yet- San Francisco was by far one of the most laid back, gorgeous, and EXPENSIVE cities we have ever been too in our married existence. it truly was one of the best times we have ever had. we were able to relax and truly remember what was important- not bills, money (or lack there of), not school, work, or even drama with friends or family- nope it was each other, our marriage and remembering why we had even come to san francisco in the first place- OUR 1 YEAR WEDDING ANNIVERSARY! yep, we have been married for a year already! can you guys believe it? we sure couldn't! i am glad that we took this time with each other, to truly appreciate one another and how much we love each other, and always, always will. so without further ado, here are some lovely snapshots of our trip :0)
this is hubby and i in front of the golden gate bridge- the picture does not do it justice, this bridge was absolutely GORGEOUS! it was one of our favorite parts of the trip!
this is me enjoying one of my many glasses of Sangria- D thought i should have all the garnish, i believe we were a little intoxicated at the time- but hey, who cares? we're on vacation!
Pier 39 was kind of a tourist trap- but the seals were awesome!!!! they were so cute, and so adorable i just couldn't stop staring at them! :0)
these are our new friends that we met in the Castro District of San Francisco. If you didn't know the Castro District prides itself on being one of the most open and accepting districts in San Francisco of Gay and Lesbian couples. Darin and i absolutely loved hanging out in the castro, the people were friendly, courteous, and more than willing to help a couple of tourists! we ended up meeting these guys at bar called Twin Peaks- it was actually the day of our anniversary so they bought us a drink and we watched Michael Phelps kick some olympic ass!
Another awesome thing about the castro? Hot Cookie! This place had the most amazing cookies....EVER! Besides cookies they also sold underwear that said "HOT COOKIE" on them- if you bought one you could model them and get your picture on the wall- no matter how much i tried to get hubby to model the "HOT" undies he just wouldn't do it- so alas no underwear pic on the walls of San Fran for us!
i have more pictures that i will definately share later- i would hate to use them all up on one post! then again we did take about 600 pics..... yea we are definately freaks with the camera!
- another big milestone in our lives is that i am back in school.....AND SO IS DARIN! i am soooooo proud of my hubby! he started school to become an Anesthesiology Technician! he is really enjoying it, i can tell he will really like being in school again! he is sooooooo much happier with a new job, and a new outlook on life! we get to spend more time together, have dinner together like a regular couple, and actually be home on the same days!
- i got offered a position by the current company i am working for. i have been offered this position a couple of times and i finally decided to bite. why you ask? well because when i really thought about it, i didn't have a plan after i graduate this semester. i love where i work- i love the people, the hours, and the workload isn't entirely too bad. this isn't to say i don't want to move on- but i don't want to move on right now. i want to concentrate on making some money, figure out if i want to go to grad school, and then make my decision. i am 23 years old and not really in any rush. this is a good chance for me to move up in my company, gain a little more job experience, and also make some more money- which is a plus to taking this position! :0)another plus is that i will be getting HEALTH INSURANCE!!!!! which is a huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge factor! i can't wait to have health insurance and rest a little easier at night!
-hubby and i are getting sooooooooooooo much closer to paying off our debt! i can not wait to be debt free- then we can finally start saving for the future and putting our money towards important things- like a mortgage maybe? :0)
- and lastly hubby and i have been talking about TTC- not right this second but in the future. we have a few more things we needed to map out mapped out and we finally feel good about our plans. i just recently purchased the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" which i have heard awesome things about- i can't wait to start reading!
So things are a little hectic, but at the same time soooooooooo amazing! I feel like we are finally headed in the right direction!
i have been reading my blog list religiously still so i am well caught up on what you are all up to! now you can hopefully catch up with me- i promise the next absence won't be so long!
hope everyone had a great labor day!!!! look for more posts soon!
Thursday, July 24, 2008
roughest two weeks....ever
so i have definately had the roughest two weeks that i have had in a long time.... i am completely beat! i didn't realize just how many hours i put in until i did- 50 last week, and 50 this week- i say goodbye to my overtime after tomorrow which i have to say i am glad to do! it's been nice making extra money, but in the end when your too tired to do ANYTHING the money kind of looses it's appeal.
so what else has been going on with me you might ask? well, to be honest, not much- i have been working, sleeping, eating....repeat- but in my slightly spare time there have been a few things accomplished, which i have to contribute to hubby stepping it up a notch while i am working these long hours! he has had dinner ready every night when i come home, he has been cleaning, doing laundry, and giving me much needed pep talks via email and text message while i am at work :0)
what we have been really focusing on is our trip to San Francisco! It is only a week away- we leave August 5th and return on August 13th- this trip is a DREAM COME TRUE! we both need this getaway sooooooo much- it is going to help us both relax and get ready for what is to come when we return- there are A LOT of things on the agenda- and not a lot of time to do them.....
- hubby will hopefully (fingers crossed) be registering for some college courses! i am soooo proud of him and excited!
- hubby will also be getting a new job- something that can work around a school schedule and also work around us- we hardly get to spend time with each other and that will hopefully all be changing very soon :0)
- i am gearing up for my last semester of college, yep you heard it right- my final semester EVER in college- well at least until i decide whether or not i will be going to grad school.
- i may be taking a job with my current company that would offer me more money as well as health benefits- something as you all know hubby and i desperately need. i posted an earlier blog a long time ago about not wanting to accept this position, but after careful thought i decided right now it is the best decision- other things will come along and when they do i will be ready for them, right now i am ready for this.
so that is about it- all the updates in a list form, because you know how i love lists :0)
oh, and another thing, why is Dark Knight so incredibly hard to see? hubby and i tried to see it on Sunday, but to no avail it was completely sold out- i am hearing good things so i hope we get to see it this weekend.
well that is all for now- my blogging will pick up after a long weekend of rest and relaxation- i need it!
so what else has been going on with me you might ask? well, to be honest, not much- i have been working, sleeping, eating....repeat- but in my slightly spare time there have been a few things accomplished, which i have to contribute to hubby stepping it up a notch while i am working these long hours! he has had dinner ready every night when i come home, he has been cleaning, doing laundry, and giving me much needed pep talks via email and text message while i am at work :0)
what we have been really focusing on is our trip to San Francisco! It is only a week away- we leave August 5th and return on August 13th- this trip is a DREAM COME TRUE! we both need this getaway sooooooo much- it is going to help us both relax and get ready for what is to come when we return- there are A LOT of things on the agenda- and not a lot of time to do them.....
- hubby will hopefully (fingers crossed) be registering for some college courses! i am soooo proud of him and excited!
- hubby will also be getting a new job- something that can work around a school schedule and also work around us- we hardly get to spend time with each other and that will hopefully all be changing very soon :0)
- i am gearing up for my last semester of college, yep you heard it right- my final semester EVER in college- well at least until i decide whether or not i will be going to grad school.
- i may be taking a job with my current company that would offer me more money as well as health benefits- something as you all know hubby and i desperately need. i posted an earlier blog a long time ago about not wanting to accept this position, but after careful thought i decided right now it is the best decision- other things will come along and when they do i will be ready for them, right now i am ready for this.
so that is about it- all the updates in a list form, because you know how i love lists :0)
oh, and another thing, why is Dark Knight so incredibly hard to see? hubby and i tried to see it on Sunday, but to no avail it was completely sold out- i am hearing good things so i hope we get to see it this weekend.
well that is all for now- my blogging will pick up after a long weekend of rest and relaxation- i need it!
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
OVERtime
yes my friends that is where i have been. over the next 2 week i will be working about 20 hours of overtime on top of a 40 hour work week. we need the extra money for san fran and of course bills.
and i truly do come home and check my work email- things happen that quickly at my work ya know.....
so i am sorry for my absence- there has been a lot going on- too much to name all in one post- but i will leave you with a list because that is what i am good at :0)
- darin has decided to go back to school- this is a big leap for hubby! i am so proud of him and i know that he will do awesome- now all he needs to do is pick a program. he will be doing a 2 year degree in the healthcare field- the problem is that some "2 year degrees" aren't really two years at all with a waitlist- so he wants to find one without a waitlist- more updates to come on that one!
- booking a hotel for san francisco is becoming a problem- there are NO hotels that are cheap in the downtown area- all the cheaper hotels are booked already so we having been trying to decide what do do, do we stay by the airport, at a hostel maybe? but then again when i think about staying in a hostel i think about that popular movie.... you know that one- i won't post a picture on my blog, much too graphic- but basically they go into the hostel, meet really "nice" people and never come out alive- yea, i don't want that to be us..... okay so i don't really believe this will happen but ya never know- and hostels are just as expensive as hotels- 80-90 bucks a night!
- work is kickin my butt, i am exhausted- i hope this is worth it in the end
well, that is all for now- it's off to work for another long day- i work from 8am-1030 pm tonight!!!! am i crazy? yes......
stay tuned! happy wednesday!
Monday, July 7, 2008
but i want it!!!!!!!!!
yep, that's right- hubby and i are on a diet. what made us come to this unbelievably horrific and insane decision? we are both overweight- i don't think we look bad, but we definately feel bad- we don't have the energy we used to, we don't look like we used to, hell, we can't even walk up a flight of stairs without being completely winded! i feel like this diet will be best for the both of us- hubby has been wanting to diet for a while and i really want to support him on this (and hopefully loose a few pounds myself :0)- you can never look to hott right?- yep that's hott with two t's!
so anyways enough about my hottness, hubby and i are on day 6 of our diet and all is going pretty well- that is if you consider mood swings and extreme panic well. i am NOT used to denying myself whatever i want to eat, whenever i want to eat it- i have just never worked like that. i have always prided myself on being able to eat whatever i wanted- and as much of it as i wanted to. then i realized that eating whatever i want is not good for me- in fact when your me and you crave things like scalloped potatoes, pizza, nachos, crunchwrap supremes, jimmy johns, and of course my all time favorite- pasta, all the time your body is bound to "give" a little- and in my case it has given a lot.
since my last couple of posts have been big reveal posts here is another one for you- when i met D i weighed about 120 pounds- totally normal for my height and age- in fact i even weighed in low on the average. i have never been one to chart my weight or even worry about my weight for that matter (except for the time i went on a mandarin orange and rice diet in high school- i was young and not so bright, what can i say?) but i have to say my concern level is on high.
my current weight? 140 lbs
that may not seem like a lot but from my point of view 20 lbs is a lot of weight to gain or such a short amount of time. and my eating habits are not good- it seems like lately i have not been able to feel full in quite a while- i am always eating, eating, eating- especially because i sit at a computer all day- when i get bored, i eat, on my 15 min break i eat, when i'm on my lunch i eat- it is a lot of food for one person to eat in a day. for example last week for lunch my fabulous coworkers and i went to taco bell- not the best place to eat but it is cheap. well i love their crunchwraps without the meat- they are sooo good. well i decided 1 was not going to be enough- so i got 2 thinking maybe i could have that other one later for a snack. i also got 2 orders of nachos- because after all they are small, right?
i ate both crunchwraps, both nachos, and a regular coke- WHAT WAS I THINKING!!!!
i definately walked away feeling full, but sluggish- that's not the way i want to feel after eating! i want to feel full, but refreshed and energized, not tired and bloated. so this diet will be good for both of us- i have already lost 5 1lbs, which i am sure is water weight but non the less it is progress!
i was a little crazy the first couple of days i will admit. taking me grocery shopping was no fun task, just ask Darin! everytime he turned around i was grabbing something full of calories and fat. if i wasn't grabbing chips, cookies, or frozen pizza i was asking him "well what CAN i eat then Dr. Dubinsky?!?!!?" in a very sarcastic tone. yea i imagine my withdrawal from sugar and fatty foods to be something similiar to that of a smoker going cold turkey- only i was much more bitchy about it....
there are many upsides to this diet- not only will we loose weight, but we will also feel better about ourselves. and i really, really want to prepare my body for when we do start TTC- if i eat bad now, how will i be able to stop myself from eating bad while i'm pregnant? i just don't want to risk my baby's health because of my bad eating habits
so wish me luck my friends, i'm going to need it...
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Sunday, June 29, 2008
babies on the brain part 2
so i know i have been leaving you all in the lurch about my thoughts on TTC
i'm sorry for my absence and leaving you all in suspense for so long! i looked at my blog and realized i hadn't posted since the 18th of June- Yikes! where has the time gone?
however i do have an excellent excuse as to why i was absent for so long. you see my good friends Mandy and Blake just had a beautiful baby boy named Cristian! He is sooo adorable and i am very, very excited for them as they start their journey as parents. I was fortunate enough to be asked to come see them while they were still in the hospital- it always makes you feel like VIP when you get asked to come see your friends newborn in the hospital :0) so i went with the hubs, camera in hand of course, and met Cristian for the first time. Darin and I both got to hold him and of course couldn't decide who should pick him up first- i am still very new at the whole newborn picking up thing so Blake helped us out and picked Cristian up for us :0). once we had him in our arms it was pure delight. blake immediately turned on his camera which he has on him for every occasion- he never misses a beat! he has successfully documented Cristian's first,second and even third days in the world! i was lucky enough to get some cute shots of Cristian as well as steal a few shots that Blake and D took.....
the lovely parents <3
hubby with Cristian
Me with Cristian
i may look a little scared in the picture but only because it has been a looooong time since i held a newborn- it was a piece of cake though, it felt very natural and completely surreal- does that make sense? i just couldn't believe that one of my closest friends had a baby- it made me realize just how much time flies. Mandy and Blake are going to be such amazing parents. they have unbelievably huge hearts and are wonderful people who would do anything they could to help you out. i am so excited to be apart of their lives and now apart of Cristian's! i walked out of the hospital feeling great- hubby did too. we both couldn't stop talking about how cute Cristian was and how lucky Mandy and Blake are- it's a beautiful thing to have a baby and i can't think of anything that D and I want more in life then to bring a baby into the world.
that being said, i have to thank all of you tremendously for your comments- it feels good to be able to have people to turn to- some of you i have met, some of you i have not and may never get the privilege to do so but it is still nice to know that people will share their opinions, thoughts, and encouragement with me on my blog, which is something i have grown to love about blogging.
after careful consideration and many hours of talking over wine (you have to have wine right? :0) hubby and i have decided that although we are ready to have children right now is not the time. another big secret? are you ready for this one guys?
we do not have health insurance....
wow, what a big secret for me to reveal on my blog! for a long time hubby and i would always dance around the subject of health insurance. it just seems like a taboo not to have health insurance and believe you me if we could afford it- we would have it! D's job offers it but it is far too expensive and my job does not currently offer it to me because of my status at work. so here we sit, two adults and no health insurance. i can't imagine having a baby and not having health insurance- i think not only about us and the costs we would accrue but also about the baby- what if she/he needed medical attention and we didn't have insurance? i realize that we would be able to pay out of pocket but paying out of pocket is NOT easy. To be honest i have never in my life had health insurance. when i was growing up my mom couldn't afford it so we always paid out of pocket. that being said because i have always paid out of pocket for my health care i have realized just how important it is. we definately plan on getting it soon- within the next 6 months- however right now it is still not feasible.
i also realized this weekend that not everything happens all at once. we got married almost a year ago, 41 days until our 1 year wedding anniversary! (not like i'm counting down or anything) it has always been hard for me to accept that some things you have to wait for. just because hubby and i may want kids right now does not mean it is the best time for us to do so. like i said before in my previous post we are soooo excited to have kids- we talk about it a lot and look forward to the future when we are a little more ready- we are ready emotionally but things are not quite set they way they need to be yet. at first when i realized this i was sad, why can't everything just happen right now?!!?!! hubby though, reminded me that just because it doesn't happen now, doesn't mean it won't happen soon- it just means not right this second- which i am okay with.
so until our time of TTC i will just have to gush about babies on my blog- and post cute pictures of my friends babies while we wait :0) i can't wait for our journey to begin as parents- it will be an amazing time full of love and excitement- it is something we both can not wait to start. when will we start? well my dear friends i can't let every secret go on my blog! :0) we definately have a time in mind and i of course will be glowing- too bad glow will not show on my blog :0)
have a great tuesday everyone!
i'm sorry for my absence and leaving you all in suspense for so long! i looked at my blog and realized i hadn't posted since the 18th of June- Yikes! where has the time gone?
however i do have an excellent excuse as to why i was absent for so long. you see my good friends Mandy and Blake just had a beautiful baby boy named Cristian! He is sooo adorable and i am very, very excited for them as they start their journey as parents. I was fortunate enough to be asked to come see them while they were still in the hospital- it always makes you feel like VIP when you get asked to come see your friends newborn in the hospital :0) so i went with the hubs, camera in hand of course, and met Cristian for the first time. Darin and I both got to hold him and of course couldn't decide who should pick him up first- i am still very new at the whole newborn picking up thing so Blake helped us out and picked Cristian up for us :0). once we had him in our arms it was pure delight. blake immediately turned on his camera which he has on him for every occasion- he never misses a beat! he has successfully documented Cristian's first,second and even third days in the world! i was lucky enough to get some cute shots of Cristian as well as steal a few shots that Blake and D took.....
the lovely parents <3
hubby with Cristian
Me with Cristian
i may look a little scared in the picture but only because it has been a looooong time since i held a newborn- it was a piece of cake though, it felt very natural and completely surreal- does that make sense? i just couldn't believe that one of my closest friends had a baby- it made me realize just how much time flies. Mandy and Blake are going to be such amazing parents. they have unbelievably huge hearts and are wonderful people who would do anything they could to help you out. i am so excited to be apart of their lives and now apart of Cristian's! i walked out of the hospital feeling great- hubby did too. we both couldn't stop talking about how cute Cristian was and how lucky Mandy and Blake are- it's a beautiful thing to have a baby and i can't think of anything that D and I want more in life then to bring a baby into the world.
that being said, i have to thank all of you tremendously for your comments- it feels good to be able to have people to turn to- some of you i have met, some of you i have not and may never get the privilege to do so but it is still nice to know that people will share their opinions, thoughts, and encouragement with me on my blog, which is something i have grown to love about blogging.
after careful consideration and many hours of talking over wine (you have to have wine right? :0) hubby and i have decided that although we are ready to have children right now is not the time. another big secret? are you ready for this one guys?
we do not have health insurance....
wow, what a big secret for me to reveal on my blog! for a long time hubby and i would always dance around the subject of health insurance. it just seems like a taboo not to have health insurance and believe you me if we could afford it- we would have it! D's job offers it but it is far too expensive and my job does not currently offer it to me because of my status at work. so here we sit, two adults and no health insurance. i can't imagine having a baby and not having health insurance- i think not only about us and the costs we would accrue but also about the baby- what if she/he needed medical attention and we didn't have insurance? i realize that we would be able to pay out of pocket but paying out of pocket is NOT easy. To be honest i have never in my life had health insurance. when i was growing up my mom couldn't afford it so we always paid out of pocket. that being said because i have always paid out of pocket for my health care i have realized just how important it is. we definately plan on getting it soon- within the next 6 months- however right now it is still not feasible.
i also realized this weekend that not everything happens all at once. we got married almost a year ago, 41 days until our 1 year wedding anniversary! (not like i'm counting down or anything) it has always been hard for me to accept that some things you have to wait for. just because hubby and i may want kids right now does not mean it is the best time for us to do so. like i said before in my previous post we are soooo excited to have kids- we talk about it a lot and look forward to the future when we are a little more ready- we are ready emotionally but things are not quite set they way they need to be yet. at first when i realized this i was sad, why can't everything just happen right now?!!?!! hubby though, reminded me that just because it doesn't happen now, doesn't mean it won't happen soon- it just means not right this second- which i am okay with.
so until our time of TTC i will just have to gush about babies on my blog- and post cute pictures of my friends babies while we wait :0) i can't wait for our journey to begin as parents- it will be an amazing time full of love and excitement- it is something we both can not wait to start. when will we start? well my dear friends i can't let every secret go on my blog! :0) we definately have a time in mind and i of course will be glowing- too bad glow will not show on my blog :0)
have a great tuesday everyone!
Saturday, June 28, 2008
i swear i'm still here
sorry for the mini-absence this week guys- it has been one LONG week- full of family drama, mandatory overtime at work, births, jazz music, and my favorite passtime- weddings with Molly! i will post more on all of those things sunday when i can recooperate from my crazy weekend!
so as i get ready for work i just wanted to post a picture- since i clearly missed wordless wednesday this week i thought i would make up for it....
and don't worry, there is a TTC post coming Sunday- i just have been writing it in pieces- you can look for those updates Sunday night- i promise!
so i will leave you with a photo just for the heck of it.
have a good Saturday everyone! more to come Sunday!
picture of how we spend our days off together on thursdays- darin calls this my duck face, not just because i love ducks so much but because i make this face everytime i love something is see- maybe i will just have to have a whole post of "duck face" pictures so you all believe me :0)
so as i get ready for work i just wanted to post a picture- since i clearly missed wordless wednesday this week i thought i would make up for it....
and don't worry, there is a TTC post coming Sunday- i just have been writing it in pieces- you can look for those updates Sunday night- i promise!
so i will leave you with a photo just for the heck of it.
have a good Saturday everyone! more to come Sunday!
picture of how we spend our days off together on thursdays- darin calls this my duck face, not just because i love ducks so much but because i make this face everytime i love something is see- maybe i will just have to have a whole post of "duck face" pictures so you all believe me :0)
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
what would a blog be without at least one TMI post?
yes dear readers the time has come.... a post with entirely TMI (just in case there are a few people who may not know TMI= Too Much Information) I knew i was bound to put one of these posts up but i didn't know when- today is the day so here it is....
hubby and i were talking last night... you remember hubby right?
Just in case you didn't- which i know you all do, if nothing else the picture was just another excuse to put a cute picture of D in my blog :0)
So we were talking last night about the future- about a house, possibly a dog, some new plants, and kids.....wait did i just say kids? Yes, it is true we actually had a conversation about kids. So then of course the discussion moved to when, when should we start trying, how long will it take, how do we know if we are truly ready? All of these questions were discussed- good answers emerged and of course there are always some questions left lingering. There is no way to know if you are every truly ready. Darin and I still enjoy going out and having fun but we have slowed our going out down quite a bit over the last year. And there are of course other signs as well that point to being ready to have a baby- I feel like i am completely ready- physically and mentally, it is at times all i think about. Darin has also began talking about our future with kids- whenever we see a baby in the store, or hold one of our friends babies we can't stop smiling.
We did decide however to hold off for just a little while longer- there are still a few things that need to fall into place before we start TTC, and because i am a list freak here is a list of things we would like to do before we have a baby...
- buy a house: we have had our eye on one house in particular- it keeps going down in price and we are hoping it keeps going down- we will have to re-visit it at the end of summer and see what is what on the house front
- hubby wants to switch his job: he is VERY unhappy with his current job. the economy is not great right now- because he is a car salesman he makes most of his money off of commission. If people don't buy cars he doesn't make any money which creates a lot of stress for him as well as our bank account. he has his eye on a couple of opportunities so keep your fingers crossed! and of course if anyone has any employment ideas please feel free to throw them our way!
- we would like to have some money saved up- i know that everyone always says you will never have enough money- which is completely true- i know that now more than ever. so if we can have some sort of backup in our account before we have kids we will be able to feel a little bit more secure just in case the unexpected were to happen
So i bet you all are wondering where my TMI comes in right? Well as i was talking to hubby about TTC we realized that we really can't TTC if i am still on my BC (birth control). Now from the beginning i have always hated taking birth control. I have been on it for only 3 years but i feel that is plenty- we have been thinking of stopping the BC for a while now but have been kind of nervous to do so. we would be absolutely ecstatic and overjoyed if we got pregnant but we know that it is best if we wait until the time we agreed to start TTC. So we began researching natural family planning- which is pretty much like charting your temps and getting to know your cycle so you know which days of the month you are most fertile. I love the idea of this method because it allows me to get to know my body better- this will definately help us when we begin TTC. I also like it because i really don't want to be on BC any longer- i just don't feel the same when i am on BC- i feel it truly does mess with every hormone in your body!
So i have been researching like a mad woman about this method and i am still kind of nervous about it- i know it is not %100 percent effective but then again what method of "BC" is? Has anyone tried this method before and found it effective/ ineffective?
Sorry again if this is TMI- i just need some opinions from you lovely ladies out there :0)
I promise to return to Wordless Wednesday next week- there were just too many words floating in my brain to not write them down! :0)
hubby and i were talking last night... you remember hubby right?
Just in case you didn't- which i know you all do, if nothing else the picture was just another excuse to put a cute picture of D in my blog :0)
So we were talking last night about the future- about a house, possibly a dog, some new plants, and kids.....wait did i just say kids? Yes, it is true we actually had a conversation about kids. So then of course the discussion moved to when, when should we start trying, how long will it take, how do we know if we are truly ready? All of these questions were discussed- good answers emerged and of course there are always some questions left lingering. There is no way to know if you are every truly ready. Darin and I still enjoy going out and having fun but we have slowed our going out down quite a bit over the last year. And there are of course other signs as well that point to being ready to have a baby- I feel like i am completely ready- physically and mentally, it is at times all i think about. Darin has also began talking about our future with kids- whenever we see a baby in the store, or hold one of our friends babies we can't stop smiling.
We did decide however to hold off for just a little while longer- there are still a few things that need to fall into place before we start TTC, and because i am a list freak here is a list of things we would like to do before we have a baby...
- buy a house: we have had our eye on one house in particular- it keeps going down in price and we are hoping it keeps going down- we will have to re-visit it at the end of summer and see what is what on the house front
- hubby wants to switch his job: he is VERY unhappy with his current job. the economy is not great right now- because he is a car salesman he makes most of his money off of commission. If people don't buy cars he doesn't make any money which creates a lot of stress for him as well as our bank account. he has his eye on a couple of opportunities so keep your fingers crossed! and of course if anyone has any employment ideas please feel free to throw them our way!
- we would like to have some money saved up- i know that everyone always says you will never have enough money- which is completely true- i know that now more than ever. so if we can have some sort of backup in our account before we have kids we will be able to feel a little bit more secure just in case the unexpected were to happen
So i bet you all are wondering where my TMI comes in right? Well as i was talking to hubby about TTC we realized that we really can't TTC if i am still on my BC (birth control). Now from the beginning i have always hated taking birth control. I have been on it for only 3 years but i feel that is plenty- we have been thinking of stopping the BC for a while now but have been kind of nervous to do so. we would be absolutely ecstatic and overjoyed if we got pregnant but we know that it is best if we wait until the time we agreed to start TTC. So we began researching natural family planning- which is pretty much like charting your temps and getting to know your cycle so you know which days of the month you are most fertile. I love the idea of this method because it allows me to get to know my body better- this will definately help us when we begin TTC. I also like it because i really don't want to be on BC any longer- i just don't feel the same when i am on BC- i feel it truly does mess with every hormone in your body!
So i have been researching like a mad woman about this method and i am still kind of nervous about it- i know it is not %100 percent effective but then again what method of "BC" is? Has anyone tried this method before and found it effective/ ineffective?
Sorry again if this is TMI- i just need some opinions from you lovely ladies out there :0)
I promise to return to Wordless Wednesday next week- there were just too many words floating in my brain to not write them down! :0)
Friday, June 13, 2008
so those people aren't imaginary?
No dear Husband, those people i blog with on the internet are not imaginary- in fact they are so real that i have pictures to prove it!
The Lovely Ladies above: Julia, Erin, Julia, Sierra, Kelly, Andrea, Natasha, Me, and Katherine
Don't get me wrong- my husband was very excited for me that i was meeting a group of girls from my blog list- in fact he thought it was "awesome, funny- but awesome" that's a direct quote. :0)
The girls and i headed down to The Wicked Hop which i tell you all is the most fabulous restaurant and i highly recommend it. The burger with guacamole? INCREDIBLE! We had a fabulous time- I did not know many of these ladies and i was a bit nervous- but as i soon found out i had no need to be nervous, they were all regular girls- just like me, imagine that :0) What was i expecting you ask? Well there is always that fear when meeting someone new that you won't get along, or that they won't like you, or that you'll forget to wear deodorant or something crazy like that (sidenote, i did in fact remember the deodorant)
We had an awesome time and promised to do a GTG again soon (Get Together- just in case someone reads that and wonders what it means :0)
And of course what would an outing be without your classic creepy guy in the corner?
So my friends it is true that you CAN meet people on the internet and that they are actually very normal and just like you and i. In fact when getting together with people for the first time there are no better people to get together with then people who have like interests- or obsessions- like blogging :0)
The Lovely Ladies above: Julia, Erin, Julia, Sierra, Kelly, Andrea, Natasha, Me, and Katherine
Don't get me wrong- my husband was very excited for me that i was meeting a group of girls from my blog list- in fact he thought it was "awesome, funny- but awesome" that's a direct quote. :0)
The girls and i headed down to The Wicked Hop which i tell you all is the most fabulous restaurant and i highly recommend it. The burger with guacamole? INCREDIBLE! We had a fabulous time- I did not know many of these ladies and i was a bit nervous- but as i soon found out i had no need to be nervous, they were all regular girls- just like me, imagine that :0) What was i expecting you ask? Well there is always that fear when meeting someone new that you won't get along, or that they won't like you, or that you'll forget to wear deodorant or something crazy like that (sidenote, i did in fact remember the deodorant)
We had an awesome time and promised to do a GTG again soon (Get Together- just in case someone reads that and wonders what it means :0)
And of course what would an outing be without your classic creepy guy in the corner?
So my friends it is true that you CAN meet people on the internet and that they are actually very normal and just like you and i. In fact when getting together with people for the first time there are no better people to get together with then people who have like interests- or obsessions- like blogging :0)
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Monday, June 9, 2008
special package update
hi everyone! sorry i have been absent for a little while- there has been A LOT going on- things i won't go into in this post because i want this post to be about one thing and one thing only- however i will post about those other things later and get everyone caught up :0)
so i was telling you all in a previous post about a "special package" that i was sending to a very very special someone. Well that special someone was Keri who i have posted about before in a previous post. If you haven't yet read about my very very special someone you can read about her here
after hearing Julia's story about Keri i decided i wanted to do something special for her. i posted about Keri, and her amazing strength, her warming personality, and how much of an inspiration she was to all of us with her positive attitude and kick-ass view on all that was happening to her. I wanted to do more however- i just felt like it wasn't enough to write a blog post. I wanted to give Keri something special- something that would make her smile and let her know that she is special and that she has a lot of people rooting for her! I talked to Julia who first introduced us all to Keri and her story. I told Julia i wanted to help and she gave me a great idea- how about scarves? As you all probably remember Keri has beautiful curly blonde hair that she would possibly be loosing after Chemo. I LOVED the idea of scarves but i wasn't sure where i was going to find a bunch of cool scarves. And i didn't just want to get her one scarf because i was sure she would probably get bored with just one color. That's when the light bulb in my head turned on..... What if i HAND MADE her a bunch of fun, girly, scarves? :0)
So i decided to use my wonderful Fiber Fabrics class as an outlet to make Keri a bunch of beautiful handmade scarves for every possible occasion she would ever need one! I got help from the lovely ladies in my college Fiber Fabrics class, bought some beautiful silk scarves, and got to work! Here are some fun pictures of us with the scarves we made... (side note- i'm the awkward looking one in the purple sweater :0)
Some of us made 1 scarf and some of us made 2 or even 3! I can't thank these girls enough for helping me make something special and unique for Keri. These girls made these absolutely beautiful scarves the week before final exams! I couldn't have been more appreciative!
Julia told me Keri received the scarves and was absolutely touched! She even brought some of the scarves with her on her recent trip home to show her family! I was so excited that she loved them and that they were something she could use to remind herself how fabulous she is and how much everyone is thinking of her!
Hope you are all having a wonderful Monday! Look for another big post tomorrow!
so i was telling you all in a previous post about a "special package" that i was sending to a very very special someone. Well that special someone was Keri who i have posted about before in a previous post. If you haven't yet read about my very very special someone you can read about her here
after hearing Julia's story about Keri i decided i wanted to do something special for her. i posted about Keri, and her amazing strength, her warming personality, and how much of an inspiration she was to all of us with her positive attitude and kick-ass view on all that was happening to her. I wanted to do more however- i just felt like it wasn't enough to write a blog post. I wanted to give Keri something special- something that would make her smile and let her know that she is special and that she has a lot of people rooting for her! I talked to Julia who first introduced us all to Keri and her story. I told Julia i wanted to help and she gave me a great idea- how about scarves? As you all probably remember Keri has beautiful curly blonde hair that she would possibly be loosing after Chemo. I LOVED the idea of scarves but i wasn't sure where i was going to find a bunch of cool scarves. And i didn't just want to get her one scarf because i was sure she would probably get bored with just one color. That's when the light bulb in my head turned on..... What if i HAND MADE her a bunch of fun, girly, scarves? :0)
So i decided to use my wonderful Fiber Fabrics class as an outlet to make Keri a bunch of beautiful handmade scarves for every possible occasion she would ever need one! I got help from the lovely ladies in my college Fiber Fabrics class, bought some beautiful silk scarves, and got to work! Here are some fun pictures of us with the scarves we made... (side note- i'm the awkward looking one in the purple sweater :0)
Some of us made 1 scarf and some of us made 2 or even 3! I can't thank these girls enough for helping me make something special and unique for Keri. These girls made these absolutely beautiful scarves the week before final exams! I couldn't have been more appreciative!
Julia told me Keri received the scarves and was absolutely touched! She even brought some of the scarves with her on her recent trip home to show her family! I was so excited that she loved them and that they were something she could use to remind herself how fabulous she is and how much everyone is thinking of her!
Hope you are all having a wonderful Monday! Look for another big post tomorrow!
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
Wordless Wednesday
In an attempt to post more often i have added in a Wordless Wednesday post- i forgot who i got this idea from so i'm sorry i didn't credit you!
The picture this week is what i will be dreaming of for the next 2 months....
That's right guys- Hubby and I are going to California for our 1 year Wedding Anniversary!!!! I am beyond excited- a whole week of uninterrupted time with my husband! I can't wait! If any of you girls have any suggestions as to where to go while we are there please let me know! We will be in Nappa Valley for a little while and then we will be heading to San Diego!
Look for a post that will be pretty thought provoking later- i will need lots of comments!
Sorry this post wasn't very wordless- sometimes i just don't know when to stop :0)
The picture this week is what i will be dreaming of for the next 2 months....
That's right guys- Hubby and I are going to California for our 1 year Wedding Anniversary!!!! I am beyond excited- a whole week of uninterrupted time with my husband! I can't wait! If any of you girls have any suggestions as to where to go while we are there please let me know! We will be in Nappa Valley for a little while and then we will be heading to San Diego!
Look for a post that will be pretty thought provoking later- i will need lots of comments!
Sorry this post wasn't very wordless- sometimes i just don't know when to stop :0)
Monday, June 2, 2008
a little something for monday
hello all! i know i did not post the pictures that i promised- however my special package girl just received her package- and LOVED it! so i will post those pictures and explain later today :0)
until then i will post a picture- because who doesn't love a good, wholesome, hilarious picture on a Monday morning?
check the blog later for more on the contents of the package i sent Keri :0)
here is a picture of me getting my hair done at the "trial run" for my wedding. I look hot don't I?
Happy Monday!
until then i will post a picture- because who doesn't love a good, wholesome, hilarious picture on a Monday morning?
check the blog later for more on the contents of the package i sent Keri :0)
here is a picture of me getting my hair done at the "trial run" for my wedding. I look hot don't I?
Happy Monday!
Friday, May 23, 2008
special packages, random thoughts, time to catch my breath
AND BREATH....................
Yep, i think this is the first day in a long time i have been able to relax- no where to go, nothing to do, no one here but me and my lovely cat- you remember dexter right? just in case you don't......
that's right- a day completely and totally to myself- so to myself i almost don't know what to do! i am sure i will manage however- there are a lot of things i have been meaning to do- like clean my house! it is an absolute disaster people! i can't believe i let it go this far- i don't think there is a clean dish in the cabinet, a clean pair of socks in the drawer, or anything clean for that matter. that will all get done though- rome wasn't built in a day right?
so you are all probably wondering what the title of my post means, "special packages"- well for some time now i have had a very special project in the works for a very special girl- i don't know if she has received the package yet so i can't let too much slip. The postmaster who was all too kind to help me send this package and take the time to explain what box is best to use for said items said that it should be arriving at her house today- which is perfect! i will post more about this on sunday- with pictures :0) just in case she does read my blog i would hate to ruin her surprise! but i will tell you all how important this project was to me. I had help from 10 lovely ladies from my college fiber fabrics class to make this project happen and i am sooooo happy with the results! i can't wait to post pictures! check back on sunday! :0)
as for life, well it is going- slowly, faster then i would like sometimes, and very very hectic! like i said i think this is the first day i have had off in some time and although that makes me happy because we are making more money and getting incredibly closer to paying off our debt, i still really want to have some form of a summer break- however when i get a goal in my head i can never seem to get it out so that is why i am working as much as i have been- where am i working you ask? well here is the rundown.....
1) Medical Biller- i am a medical biller 4 days a week, 10 hours each day. i have my own cubicle but i have to share- let me tell you i secretly hate sharing- hubby reminds me of this personality glitch everyday! if i have some sort of food that i love and hubby grabs for it he is likely to loose his hand, seriously.... i imagine that will become worse once i become pregnant- i hear those cravings are serious! so i share my cubicle and because i am a germ-freak i have to come in every morning and sanitize my entire cubicle- desktop, chair arms, mouse, phone, keyboard, drawer handles- everything people! better safe then sorry right? when people get sick at my job they figure as long as they can still type they will come in.... let's just say i don't like their philosophy. with such close quarters that is a ticket to sickness! so basically i sit for 10 hours a day starting at 6am and ending at 430 pm typing my little heart out and billing people for anything and everything. i could tell you the billing codes for pretty much any diagnosis. when i go to the doctor and the nurse is trying to find a code for a pap smear- i know the code, i tell her and she looks at me as if i have two heads and ten arms just waving like crazy at her. she's right- who in there right mind would just KNOW the code for a pap smear? oh well- this lady knows her pap smears and is proud of it!
2)activities director- my aunts group home: this is a job that i love, but is extremely challenging for me. i took this job to not only help my aunt out but also to boost my resume and get something on there that is related to my degree. i have a lot of fieldwork and coursework that is very helpful for getting me a job in the field i want however it's not enough hours in the field so i took this job. i pretty much plan activities for my old people- i love my old people- most days.... when they don't constantly ask me for cookies or a new pair or stockings. i have done a lot of creative projects with my residents since we opened in december- it has been a very rewarding job- very time consuming, but in the end worth it.
3) wedding photographer assistant to the best photographer in the world!!!: okay so may i'm biased but i really think Molly is the best photographer in the world. I was asked to be her assistant at weddings while she is capturing the couples big day. This is by far my favorite job that i have- for me it's not really a job at all- it is beautiful to be such an intricate part of a couples wedding day- molly and i truly do spend the most time with the couple all day and i love watching the couple enjoy a day full of love, commitment, friends, family, good food, lots of laughs, and even some tears of joy. i almost always tear up at the ceremony, the first dance, and the speeches- particularly the ones by the parents. I couldn't think of a better photographer to have at your wedding day- not just because she takes fabulous pictures but also because she has been a bride- she knows what the bride and groom are going through and i have seen her put down her camera many a time to bustle the brides dress, fix a centerpiece, find the wedding party, or give the bride some encouraging words or advice. She is absolutely amazing and if you don't know her or her fabulous work- go check it out! Molly is a not only a wonderful photographer to work for, but also a wonderful friend who i am glad i have gotten the chance to know over these past couple of years. Check out Molly's work on her HERE
so those are all of my jobs- they are all different and all special to me. people always ask me why i don't just quit one of my jobs and keep the rest- my answer is that i would get bored. i hate coming to work and doing the same thing everyday. with my plethora of jobs i never, ever get bored!
finally i will end this post with some random thoughts- which i know is typically a Monday post but i will make an exception.
- hubby and i got the notice that our stimulus check will be coming today!!!! we will be using the money to pay on our biggest credit cards bills which will leave us under $3,000 dollars left to pay on our total debt! D and i were definately doing a victory dance in our living room last night- i promise to post pictures later :0) the day we mail our final payments to our credit card companies will be one of the best days our life- we can finally move on! all of this debt makes you feel stuck in time- i want to move on and live!!!! we are so close!
- i went out and spoiled my favorite little girl yesterday at target- petra of course! i absolutely love this baby- who will turn one in October! where does time go? i feel like it was just yesterday that Nada and i reconnected after not seeing each other for over a year and i found out that she was 6 months pregnant- and of course absolutely glowing and beautiful as always! i am so glad that i am able to be a part of her and her daughters life- they are very special to me and i absolutely love to spoil them- i won't write what i got her, just in case Nada reads this :0). Hubby and i are actually going to be having a Brazilian cooking night with Nada and Martin next week! soooo excited for that !
- i can't wait to do all the things i have been waiting for my whole life to do with my husband. even though at the age of 8 i didn't know who my husband was going to be ( or that my future husband was 15 when i was dreaming of him at 8) i dreamed of what i wanted our life to be. not everything has fallen in to place yet, there are have been some speed bumps and things i never expected but there is one thing that remains the same- Darin is the man of my dreams, my rock, my love and the best thing that has ever come into my life. he saved me from the path i was going down and taught me how to loosen up- which has been much appreciated by everyone i think! we have been talking a lot lately about what we want to do in the next couple of years- a house, a beautiful baby of our own, and a trip to somewhere very exotic- Peru, Australia, Argentina- somewhere gorgeous and relaxing where we can see the highest mountains and take in a beautiful sunset on a hidden path just for us. i can't wait to see what life holds, i know it will be beautiful. hard times come and go, and then they come again- but i know we can make it through.
- i truly have the best friends in the world- they are always there for me and i love them- i know i may call in a frenzy, or not call at all- but i truly do love these people. From tears, to beers (hope you liked the picture erin :0) they are always there for me.
- i am going to ride my bike to work everyday starting next week. i REFUSE to pay $4.15/gallon for gas. And when i get home from work i will be using my car sparingly- if i can walk there, i will- i can not believe we are paying so much for foreign oil when there is enough oil in Alaska to keep us all fueled and going for the next 200 years!!!!!! what is wrong with our government!
well my friends since this post is jam packed and very very long i will leave you with a picture- which is what i am going to try to do every post because everyone loves pictures! :0)
check back on sunday for my package reveal!
here is a fun picture from my bachlorette party that i just came across- my maid of honor made up this game and it was hilarious! in the end it was erin's masterpiece that won! she knows her male organs!
Yep, i think this is the first day in a long time i have been able to relax- no where to go, nothing to do, no one here but me and my lovely cat- you remember dexter right? just in case you don't......
that's right- a day completely and totally to myself- so to myself i almost don't know what to do! i am sure i will manage however- there are a lot of things i have been meaning to do- like clean my house! it is an absolute disaster people! i can't believe i let it go this far- i don't think there is a clean dish in the cabinet, a clean pair of socks in the drawer, or anything clean for that matter. that will all get done though- rome wasn't built in a day right?
so you are all probably wondering what the title of my post means, "special packages"- well for some time now i have had a very special project in the works for a very special girl- i don't know if she has received the package yet so i can't let too much slip. The postmaster who was all too kind to help me send this package and take the time to explain what box is best to use for said items said that it should be arriving at her house today- which is perfect! i will post more about this on sunday- with pictures :0) just in case she does read my blog i would hate to ruin her surprise! but i will tell you all how important this project was to me. I had help from 10 lovely ladies from my college fiber fabrics class to make this project happen and i am sooooo happy with the results! i can't wait to post pictures! check back on sunday! :0)
as for life, well it is going- slowly, faster then i would like sometimes, and very very hectic! like i said i think this is the first day i have had off in some time and although that makes me happy because we are making more money and getting incredibly closer to paying off our debt, i still really want to have some form of a summer break- however when i get a goal in my head i can never seem to get it out so that is why i am working as much as i have been- where am i working you ask? well here is the rundown.....
1) Medical Biller- i am a medical biller 4 days a week, 10 hours each day. i have my own cubicle but i have to share- let me tell you i secretly hate sharing- hubby reminds me of this personality glitch everyday! if i have some sort of food that i love and hubby grabs for it he is likely to loose his hand, seriously.... i imagine that will become worse once i become pregnant- i hear those cravings are serious! so i share my cubicle and because i am a germ-freak i have to come in every morning and sanitize my entire cubicle- desktop, chair arms, mouse, phone, keyboard, drawer handles- everything people! better safe then sorry right? when people get sick at my job they figure as long as they can still type they will come in.... let's just say i don't like their philosophy. with such close quarters that is a ticket to sickness! so basically i sit for 10 hours a day starting at 6am and ending at 430 pm typing my little heart out and billing people for anything and everything. i could tell you the billing codes for pretty much any diagnosis. when i go to the doctor and the nurse is trying to find a code for a pap smear- i know the code, i tell her and she looks at me as if i have two heads and ten arms just waving like crazy at her. she's right- who in there right mind would just KNOW the code for a pap smear? oh well- this lady knows her pap smears and is proud of it!
2)activities director- my aunts group home: this is a job that i love, but is extremely challenging for me. i took this job to not only help my aunt out but also to boost my resume and get something on there that is related to my degree. i have a lot of fieldwork and coursework that is very helpful for getting me a job in the field i want however it's not enough hours in the field so i took this job. i pretty much plan activities for my old people- i love my old people- most days.... when they don't constantly ask me for cookies or a new pair or stockings. i have done a lot of creative projects with my residents since we opened in december- it has been a very rewarding job- very time consuming, but in the end worth it.
3) wedding photographer assistant to the best photographer in the world!!!: okay so may i'm biased but i really think Molly is the best photographer in the world. I was asked to be her assistant at weddings while she is capturing the couples big day. This is by far my favorite job that i have- for me it's not really a job at all- it is beautiful to be such an intricate part of a couples wedding day- molly and i truly do spend the most time with the couple all day and i love watching the couple enjoy a day full of love, commitment, friends, family, good food, lots of laughs, and even some tears of joy. i almost always tear up at the ceremony, the first dance, and the speeches- particularly the ones by the parents. I couldn't think of a better photographer to have at your wedding day- not just because she takes fabulous pictures but also because she has been a bride- she knows what the bride and groom are going through and i have seen her put down her camera many a time to bustle the brides dress, fix a centerpiece, find the wedding party, or give the bride some encouraging words or advice. She is absolutely amazing and if you don't know her or her fabulous work- go check it out! Molly is a not only a wonderful photographer to work for, but also a wonderful friend who i am glad i have gotten the chance to know over these past couple of years. Check out Molly's work on her HERE
so those are all of my jobs- they are all different and all special to me. people always ask me why i don't just quit one of my jobs and keep the rest- my answer is that i would get bored. i hate coming to work and doing the same thing everyday. with my plethora of jobs i never, ever get bored!
finally i will end this post with some random thoughts- which i know is typically a Monday post but i will make an exception.
- hubby and i got the notice that our stimulus check will be coming today!!!! we will be using the money to pay on our biggest credit cards bills which will leave us under $3,000 dollars left to pay on our total debt! D and i were definately doing a victory dance in our living room last night- i promise to post pictures later :0) the day we mail our final payments to our credit card companies will be one of the best days our life- we can finally move on! all of this debt makes you feel stuck in time- i want to move on and live!!!! we are so close!
- i went out and spoiled my favorite little girl yesterday at target- petra of course! i absolutely love this baby- who will turn one in October! where does time go? i feel like it was just yesterday that Nada and i reconnected after not seeing each other for over a year and i found out that she was 6 months pregnant- and of course absolutely glowing and beautiful as always! i am so glad that i am able to be a part of her and her daughters life- they are very special to me and i absolutely love to spoil them- i won't write what i got her, just in case Nada reads this :0). Hubby and i are actually going to be having a Brazilian cooking night with Nada and Martin next week! soooo excited for that !
- i can't wait to do all the things i have been waiting for my whole life to do with my husband. even though at the age of 8 i didn't know who my husband was going to be ( or that my future husband was 15 when i was dreaming of him at 8) i dreamed of what i wanted our life to be. not everything has fallen in to place yet, there are have been some speed bumps and things i never expected but there is one thing that remains the same- Darin is the man of my dreams, my rock, my love and the best thing that has ever come into my life. he saved me from the path i was going down and taught me how to loosen up- which has been much appreciated by everyone i think! we have been talking a lot lately about what we want to do in the next couple of years- a house, a beautiful baby of our own, and a trip to somewhere very exotic- Peru, Australia, Argentina- somewhere gorgeous and relaxing where we can see the highest mountains and take in a beautiful sunset on a hidden path just for us. i can't wait to see what life holds, i know it will be beautiful. hard times come and go, and then they come again- but i know we can make it through.
- i truly have the best friends in the world- they are always there for me and i love them- i know i may call in a frenzy, or not call at all- but i truly do love these people. From tears, to beers (hope you liked the picture erin :0) they are always there for me.
- i am going to ride my bike to work everyday starting next week. i REFUSE to pay $4.15/gallon for gas. And when i get home from work i will be using my car sparingly- if i can walk there, i will- i can not believe we are paying so much for foreign oil when there is enough oil in Alaska to keep us all fueled and going for the next 200 years!!!!!! what is wrong with our government!
well my friends since this post is jam packed and very very long i will leave you with a picture- which is what i am going to try to do every post because everyone loves pictures! :0)
check back on sunday for my package reveal!
here is a fun picture from my bachlorette party that i just came across- my maid of honor made up this game and it was hilarious! in the end it was erin's masterpiece that won! she knows her male organs!
Sunday, May 11, 2008
the most wonderful woman in the world
i wanted to write a post in honor of my mom. i have been wanting to do this for a while now to tell the blog world just how lucky i am to have such an awesome mom and well there is no time like the present- especially because it is mother's day!
i feel very lucky to have my mom- she has been there for me through good times and bad. she is the first person i go to when i have a problem, when i've had a bad day, or when i need advice. I have always been able to talk to my mom and i feel very lucky for that- i know a lot of people who don't have a strong bond with their mothers and i wish that they did because it truly is one of the most special and loving relationships i have ever had in my life.
here are a few of my favorite pictures of us
www.mthreestudio.com
www.mthreestudio.com
www.mthreestudio.com
and those are just a few of the pictures i love of my mom and i- trust me i have a lot more!
today hubby and i celebrated mother's day with my mom with a buffet of taco's and lots of laughter. my mom lives about 10 blocks away from me so i can see her whenever i want which i am very lucky and thankful for. i know a lot of you guys have parents that live pretty far away. i was so happy to be spending mother's day with my mom- there is just something about today that i love. i loved seeing my mom's face light up when we came to the door- taco's in hand and of course a gift for her ( i love spoiling my mom).
today made me think of the day that i will be a mom and how even more special mother's day will be. there are a lot of ladies on my blog roll that are mother's for the first time this mother's day or are expecting and also have a reason to celebrate this mother's day. i am so happy for all of you and can't wait to share this day with my kid's.
Happy Mother's Day to all the Mothers!
i feel very lucky to have my mom- she has been there for me through good times and bad. she is the first person i go to when i have a problem, when i've had a bad day, or when i need advice. I have always been able to talk to my mom and i feel very lucky for that- i know a lot of people who don't have a strong bond with their mothers and i wish that they did because it truly is one of the most special and loving relationships i have ever had in my life.
here are a few of my favorite pictures of us
www.mthreestudio.com
www.mthreestudio.com
www.mthreestudio.com
and those are just a few of the pictures i love of my mom and i- trust me i have a lot more!
today hubby and i celebrated mother's day with my mom with a buffet of taco's and lots of laughter. my mom lives about 10 blocks away from me so i can see her whenever i want which i am very lucky and thankful for. i know a lot of you guys have parents that live pretty far away. i was so happy to be spending mother's day with my mom- there is just something about today that i love. i loved seeing my mom's face light up when we came to the door- taco's in hand and of course a gift for her ( i love spoiling my mom).
today made me think of the day that i will be a mom and how even more special mother's day will be. there are a lot of ladies on my blog roll that are mother's for the first time this mother's day or are expecting and also have a reason to celebrate this mother's day. i am so happy for all of you and can't wait to share this day with my kid's.
Happy Mother's Day to all the Mothers!
Monday, May 5, 2008
random monday facts
okay guys so i know i have really been bad at updating lately- there is just not enough hours in the day and my finals have taken every last bit of time i have free- which is exhausting. however the end is near! i am almost done with my finals- after this week it's all easy stuff after this. here are a few highlights from my weekend and life in general
- i finished my paper of doom (aka my psychology paper)last night at about 10:30- now why do i call it my paper of doom you ask, well because it had to be 10 pages long with a minimum of 7 references. yea.... that is why i hate reference papers! so on saturday night i sat down with a 4 pack of monster energy drinks and wrote the first 8 pages- then last night only had 2 more to go- i ended up with 11 pages instead of 10! i guess i had more to say then i thought!
- darin and i danced in my college's spring dance performance this year both friday and saturday night. we coreographed a swing dance which was a huge hit! we got lots of applause and wonderful compliments after the show. it was amazing! i received 2 credits for taking the independant study and was very glad i did. next semester i am taking modern dance- which should be very interesting. i am so excited! i hope that after i am done next december i can concentrate more on my dancing and take some additional dance classes- does anyone have any suggestions of what kind of dance classes i should take or where i should take them? i would love your ideas!
- i am finally going back to eating meat- and not just chicken. i decided that it wasn't very healthy for me to not eat meat- i don't get a lot of protein without it and i was getting very, very tired of chicken. so this weekend i sank my teeth into a wonderful pepperoni pizza with the hubby. we always bicker about what to have on our pizza- i love just cheese and some veggies- but he loves meat- any kind and lots of it! so his mouth just about dropped open when i said "let's get a pepperoni pizza"- yea that made his day for sure :0)
- school is almost done- only 2 more weeks and i am RELIEVED i seriously am not sure how much more i can take with homework and classes- i really need a break bad. with all of this nice weather we have been having it's been extremely hard for me to kick my butt into gear and get things accomplished- that's why this weekend was such a accomplishment for me- i sat down, finished my paper and didn't cram it all in at the last minute- it was a really awesome thing!
- i am actually looking forward to working full time this summer- i want to be able to be debt free by the end of summer and it looks like we will be able to do it. i don't want to be buried under debt- especially for as long as we have been. debt is unavoidable- but i want good debt- a mortgage, car payment( my car is at 190,000 miles and it wont last forever!), kids- these are things i want so badly and if we can get rid of all of our unecessary debt we can finally move on to better things. we can save for having kids, and a down payment on a house and hopefully things that we have been dying to get for a long time!
- hubby and i each got 2 parking tickets in the last 2 days for forgetting to call in our cars on the street. our landlords are re-paving our driveway so we can't park there- you think we would have remembered to call them in after the first time, NOPE! well, there goes 80 dollars down the drain. don't we pay enough taxes that we should be able to park anywhere at anytime? street parking passes, liscense plate stickers, and anything to do with the dmv is such a money maker!
- i am about to do my first wedding with Molly on may 16th and i am sooo excited! i will be her personal assitant and the best part? i get to run around and see what she does, the ins and outs of wedding photography. what is also awesome is that the photographer and the photographers assistant are the ones that spend the most time with the bride and groom all day- so you really get to contribute in a special way to their big day, i can't wait!- oh and of course we sometimes get a piece of wedding cake- i love wedding cake!
well guys that's all i have for now- more to come later when the fog of school has lifted- i can't wait to catch everyone up on everythign and actually have time to do a full blog post!
happy monday!
- i finished my paper of doom (aka my psychology paper)last night at about 10:30- now why do i call it my paper of doom you ask, well because it had to be 10 pages long with a minimum of 7 references. yea.... that is why i hate reference papers! so on saturday night i sat down with a 4 pack of monster energy drinks and wrote the first 8 pages- then last night only had 2 more to go- i ended up with 11 pages instead of 10! i guess i had more to say then i thought!
- darin and i danced in my college's spring dance performance this year both friday and saturday night. we coreographed a swing dance which was a huge hit! we got lots of applause and wonderful compliments after the show. it was amazing! i received 2 credits for taking the independant study and was very glad i did. next semester i am taking modern dance- which should be very interesting. i am so excited! i hope that after i am done next december i can concentrate more on my dancing and take some additional dance classes- does anyone have any suggestions of what kind of dance classes i should take or where i should take them? i would love your ideas!
- i am finally going back to eating meat- and not just chicken. i decided that it wasn't very healthy for me to not eat meat- i don't get a lot of protein without it and i was getting very, very tired of chicken. so this weekend i sank my teeth into a wonderful pepperoni pizza with the hubby. we always bicker about what to have on our pizza- i love just cheese and some veggies- but he loves meat- any kind and lots of it! so his mouth just about dropped open when i said "let's get a pepperoni pizza"- yea that made his day for sure :0)
- school is almost done- only 2 more weeks and i am RELIEVED i seriously am not sure how much more i can take with homework and classes- i really need a break bad. with all of this nice weather we have been having it's been extremely hard for me to kick my butt into gear and get things accomplished- that's why this weekend was such a accomplishment for me- i sat down, finished my paper and didn't cram it all in at the last minute- it was a really awesome thing!
- i am actually looking forward to working full time this summer- i want to be able to be debt free by the end of summer and it looks like we will be able to do it. i don't want to be buried under debt- especially for as long as we have been. debt is unavoidable- but i want good debt- a mortgage, car payment( my car is at 190,000 miles and it wont last forever!), kids- these are things i want so badly and if we can get rid of all of our unecessary debt we can finally move on to better things. we can save for having kids, and a down payment on a house and hopefully things that we have been dying to get for a long time!
- hubby and i each got 2 parking tickets in the last 2 days for forgetting to call in our cars on the street. our landlords are re-paving our driveway so we can't park there- you think we would have remembered to call them in after the first time, NOPE! well, there goes 80 dollars down the drain. don't we pay enough taxes that we should be able to park anywhere at anytime? street parking passes, liscense plate stickers, and anything to do with the dmv is such a money maker!
- i am about to do my first wedding with Molly on may 16th and i am sooo excited! i will be her personal assitant and the best part? i get to run around and see what she does, the ins and outs of wedding photography. what is also awesome is that the photographer and the photographers assistant are the ones that spend the most time with the bride and groom all day- so you really get to contribute in a special way to their big day, i can't wait!- oh and of course we sometimes get a piece of wedding cake- i love wedding cake!
well guys that's all i have for now- more to come later when the fog of school has lifted- i can't wait to catch everyone up on everythign and actually have time to do a full blog post!
happy monday!
Monday, April 28, 2008
Tagged
Molly has tagged me with a new game! I have never done one of these- so why not? :0)
1. Link to the person that tagged you and post the rules on your blog.
2. Share 5 songs you are embarrassed to admit to others you like and tell why.
3. Tag 7 random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs.
4. Let each person know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
So i really really love music- i wish this was a tag with the rules, what music you really really love and could sing it from the rooftops but it's not- so here are my songs that i am embarrassed to admit that i like
1.) Britney Spears- Piece of Me
I don't know if i could explain just how crazy i get when this song is on- but i do. I absolutely love the version with the random crazy fan in the background screaming "Leave Britney Alone!"- only played on Kiss Fm for all i can tell. When this song is played in the club it's over- let's just say that :0)
2.) Juvenile- Back That Ass Up
This song takes me back- to high school dances- lots of "cool" bump and grind moves you can do to this song guys! How dumb did i look getting "down" in my homecoming dress to the words "girl you look good, why don't you back that ass up?" ( sorry for making that sound so not the way it was supposed to!)
3.) Big and Rich- Save a Horse Ride a Cowboy
I remember doing a really bad line dance to this song for my RA conference my sophomore year of college. All of my fellow RA's complained how lame this song was- i completely agreed.... but secretly there was a little more yeee-haw in my step because i truly love this song :0)
4.) Coolio- Gangsta Paradise
Molly and i totally and completely share this obsession- i love this song and it is completely not played enough on the radio. Whenever it is played i turn it up- and have been known to hit my steering wheel and do a completely lame version of the finger point thing- yea i'm bad ass...
5.) Sisqo- Thong Song
Yep you heard it right- i love the thong song. There is just something about Sisqo that i heart- i couldn't tell you what it is but i love it :0) This song came out in 2000 and was right around the time i started going to dances my freshman year of high school. (See song #2 and you'll have the rest of the story)
Okay so now that you know all of my secret songs that i dance to like a crazy fool in my apartment i want to know yours-
I Tag....
Erin
Jessica
Julia
Erin
Sierra
Natasha
1. Link to the person that tagged you and post the rules on your blog.
2. Share 5 songs you are embarrassed to admit to others you like and tell why.
3. Tag 7 random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs.
4. Let each person know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
So i really really love music- i wish this was a tag with the rules, what music you really really love and could sing it from the rooftops but it's not- so here are my songs that i am embarrassed to admit that i like
1.) Britney Spears- Piece of Me
I don't know if i could explain just how crazy i get when this song is on- but i do. I absolutely love the version with the random crazy fan in the background screaming "Leave Britney Alone!"- only played on Kiss Fm for all i can tell. When this song is played in the club it's over- let's just say that :0)
2.) Juvenile- Back That Ass Up
This song takes me back- to high school dances- lots of "cool" bump and grind moves you can do to this song guys! How dumb did i look getting "down" in my homecoming dress to the words "girl you look good, why don't you back that ass up?" ( sorry for making that sound so not the way it was supposed to!)
3.) Big and Rich- Save a Horse Ride a Cowboy
I remember doing a really bad line dance to this song for my RA conference my sophomore year of college. All of my fellow RA's complained how lame this song was- i completely agreed.... but secretly there was a little more yeee-haw in my step because i truly love this song :0)
4.) Coolio- Gangsta Paradise
Molly and i totally and completely share this obsession- i love this song and it is completely not played enough on the radio. Whenever it is played i turn it up- and have been known to hit my steering wheel and do a completely lame version of the finger point thing- yea i'm bad ass...
5.) Sisqo- Thong Song
Yep you heard it right- i love the thong song. There is just something about Sisqo that i heart- i couldn't tell you what it is but i love it :0) This song came out in 2000 and was right around the time i started going to dances my freshman year of high school. (See song #2 and you'll have the rest of the story)
Okay so now that you know all of my secret songs that i dance to like a crazy fool in my apartment i want to know yours-
I Tag....
Erin
Jessica
Julia
Erin
Sierra
Natasha
Friday, April 25, 2008
open your eyes....
hi everyone- it has been a really long time since i have had time to post a real post- well not that long but it feels like forever!
i have been meaning to post this post for a while and i feel like today is the day. I woke up this morning to my alarm clock- as usual but not usual. I have it set to play music and i realized how fitting this song was for today's post- and honestly for a lot of posts i have written lately- especially my post a couple of days ago- which was extremely important for me to write- a lot to let go, a lot to let in- you can read that post if you'd like here
so the song was by snow patrol- i'll post the lyrics at the end of this post- they are beautiful and say a lot about what i'm going to say.
i have been following Julia's blog for a while now and she never ceases to amaze me- especially now. I can't do this story justice- Julia writes it a lot better- so please go over to her site and read about Keri.
Keri has come into my life- i don't know her but i feel as if i do. I have been following her story on Julia's blog as well as her own Journal that she has started- Keri's Journal-
The strength of Keri has amazed me- i can't imagine how hard it is to be diagnosed with Breast Cancer at the age of 26. She is one amazing and strong woman though and has made me realize how strength in time of heartache is the key. Keri is living each day- ready to kick this cancer right out of her- this strength that she has will bring her through this- i am in awe and i'm glad to have been able to follow this journey with her and Julia.
Keri will be going through a lot in the next couple of weeks- 8 rounds of chemotherapy, 6 weeks of daily radiation, multiple reconstructive surgeries, hormonal replacement therapy, and infertility treatments. Chemotherapy will throw Keri's body into menopause. Keri will have to have her eggs frozen so that she can have hope to have children in the future. This procedure will cost upwards of $10,000 dollars- and it is not covered by insurance.
If everyone who reads this donates to Keri's fund this unexpected financial burden could be lifted from her. Any amount helps- no amount is too small. I hope that everyone can help Keri- please think about donating, every dollar counts! Here is the donation information
Please make your donation check to:
Keri Wilkie Breast Cancer Medical Fund
P.O. Box 833
Emporia, KS 66801
I hope that everyone reads this and takes a minute to post something on their own blogs, journals, emails- anything! Spread this word about Keri's strength- she is so young to have this happen to her- but she faces it with a smile, and a positive attitude- we all can learn something from Keri, i know i have.
Please take a moment to link to these blogs- leave your comments, love and support- find it in your heart to donate if you can. Keri's story and donation information can also be found on Julia's blog post that i linked to above.
"Open Your Eyes"
All this feels strange and untrue
And I won't waste a minute without you
My bones ache, my skin feels cold
And I'm getting so tired and so old
The anger swells in my guts
And I won't feel these slices and cuts
I want so much to open your eyes
'Cause I need you to look into mine
Tell me that you'll open your eyes [x4]
Get up, get out, get away from these liars
'Cause they don't get your soul or your fire
Take my hand, knot your fingers through mine
And we'll walk from this dark room for the last time
Every minute from this minute now
We can do what we like anywhere
I want so much to open your eyes
'Cause I need you to look into mine
Tell me that you'll open your eyes [x8]
All this feels strange and untrue
And I won't waste a minute without you
i have been meaning to post this post for a while and i feel like today is the day. I woke up this morning to my alarm clock- as usual but not usual. I have it set to play music and i realized how fitting this song was for today's post- and honestly for a lot of posts i have written lately- especially my post a couple of days ago- which was extremely important for me to write- a lot to let go, a lot to let in- you can read that post if you'd like here
so the song was by snow patrol- i'll post the lyrics at the end of this post- they are beautiful and say a lot about what i'm going to say.
i have been following Julia's blog for a while now and she never ceases to amaze me- especially now. I can't do this story justice- Julia writes it a lot better- so please go over to her site and read about Keri.
Keri has come into my life- i don't know her but i feel as if i do. I have been following her story on Julia's blog as well as her own Journal that she has started- Keri's Journal-
The strength of Keri has amazed me- i can't imagine how hard it is to be diagnosed with Breast Cancer at the age of 26. She is one amazing and strong woman though and has made me realize how strength in time of heartache is the key. Keri is living each day- ready to kick this cancer right out of her- this strength that she has will bring her through this- i am in awe and i'm glad to have been able to follow this journey with her and Julia.
Keri will be going through a lot in the next couple of weeks- 8 rounds of chemotherapy, 6 weeks of daily radiation, multiple reconstructive surgeries, hormonal replacement therapy, and infertility treatments. Chemotherapy will throw Keri's body into menopause. Keri will have to have her eggs frozen so that she can have hope to have children in the future. This procedure will cost upwards of $10,000 dollars- and it is not covered by insurance.
If everyone who reads this donates to Keri's fund this unexpected financial burden could be lifted from her. Any amount helps- no amount is too small. I hope that everyone can help Keri- please think about donating, every dollar counts! Here is the donation information
Please make your donation check to:
Keri Wilkie Breast Cancer Medical Fund
P.O. Box 833
Emporia, KS 66801
I hope that everyone reads this and takes a minute to post something on their own blogs, journals, emails- anything! Spread this word about Keri's strength- she is so young to have this happen to her- but she faces it with a smile, and a positive attitude- we all can learn something from Keri, i know i have.
Please take a moment to link to these blogs- leave your comments, love and support- find it in your heart to donate if you can. Keri's story and donation information can also be found on Julia's blog post that i linked to above.
"Open Your Eyes"
All this feels strange and untrue
And I won't waste a minute without you
My bones ache, my skin feels cold
And I'm getting so tired and so old
The anger swells in my guts
And I won't feel these slices and cuts
I want so much to open your eyes
'Cause I need you to look into mine
Tell me that you'll open your eyes [x4]
Get up, get out, get away from these liars
'Cause they don't get your soul or your fire
Take my hand, knot your fingers through mine
And we'll walk from this dark room for the last time
Every minute from this minute now
We can do what we like anywhere
I want so much to open your eyes
'Cause I need you to look into mine
Tell me that you'll open your eyes [x8]
All this feels strange and untrue
And I won't waste a minute without you
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
i'm still here!!!
i know it's been a while guys- school is making me crazy! i will write very soon- i have an important post i want to write and i don't want to rush it- it will be up by tonight. for now here are some random thoughts....
- the weather is freakin GORGEOUS- i don't know how much longer i will be able to be productive at anything unless it is outdoors
- school is kicking my ass- there are not enough hours in the day to be efficient and i hate that- i want to be reaching my full potential but with everything i have to do it is near impossible
- the little bit of time i have had lately to see friends has been amazing- i absolutely love my friends and am so lucky to have them
- life is sometimes unfair, but we are strong and life is worth living- this is what pulls us through- i have more on this but it will have to wait until tonight- i know how you guys love to wait lol :0)
- hard work does pay off- i believe everything i am doing now is for a reason- ask me an hour from now if i feel like that and you may get a different answer- but the real answer always is yes, it does pay off in the end
- there are 3 more weeks to freedom- the countdown has begun!
- after school is done i really want to concentrate on the things that matter most- my family, wonderful husband, friends, myself, and my blog- i never thought my blog could mean this much to me but it does- even now as i type i realize how great of an outlet it is- a connection to people that although i have never met i feel like i am close to- you guys rock!
- and finally my wonderful husband- he probably thinks he married a crazy woman- babe if you are reading this and putting out a search for your real wife i promise she is coming back soon! thank you for all the crap you have been putting up with- you are a doll and i love you :0)
well guys that's all i have for now- please check the blog again tomorrow for a new post!
here is a picture i found of myself last summer- i have a thing about ducks- i love them but i'm always afraid they are going to chase me and eventually catch up to me and bite me- but here i am brave as can be- there is a video that proceeds this that i will have to post soon- and it it hilarious
- the weather is freakin GORGEOUS- i don't know how much longer i will be able to be productive at anything unless it is outdoors
- school is kicking my ass- there are not enough hours in the day to be efficient and i hate that- i want to be reaching my full potential but with everything i have to do it is near impossible
- the little bit of time i have had lately to see friends has been amazing- i absolutely love my friends and am so lucky to have them
- life is sometimes unfair, but we are strong and life is worth living- this is what pulls us through- i have more on this but it will have to wait until tonight- i know how you guys love to wait lol :0)
- hard work does pay off- i believe everything i am doing now is for a reason- ask me an hour from now if i feel like that and you may get a different answer- but the real answer always is yes, it does pay off in the end
- there are 3 more weeks to freedom- the countdown has begun!
- after school is done i really want to concentrate on the things that matter most- my family, wonderful husband, friends, myself, and my blog- i never thought my blog could mean this much to me but it does- even now as i type i realize how great of an outlet it is- a connection to people that although i have never met i feel like i am close to- you guys rock!
- and finally my wonderful husband- he probably thinks he married a crazy woman- babe if you are reading this and putting out a search for your real wife i promise she is coming back soon! thank you for all the crap you have been putting up with- you are a doll and i love you :0)
well guys that's all i have for now- please check the blog again tomorrow for a new post!
here is a picture i found of myself last summer- i have a thing about ducks- i love them but i'm always afraid they are going to chase me and eventually catch up to me and bite me- but here i am brave as can be- there is a video that proceeds this that i will have to post soon- and it it hilarious
Monday, April 14, 2008
this is how we have fun....
a video that we shot over the weekend of our cat dexter- remember the halloween kitty space suit? well we began talking about that space suit and how he didn't fit into it- so hubby made a song about him.... and his fatty ways
sorry it is sideways! still very worth watching
please don't call PETA :0)
happy monday!
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
an old worn shoe taught me a lot
as i was looking down at my keys today i realized that i have A LOT of keychains- too many in fact- so many i feel that they were the reason for the replacement of my ignition a couple of months back. D is constantly telling me that i should think about retiring some of my keychains. so today i looked at them- all of them. from my "tofu fighting" keychain to my laser pointer keychain and finally to his keychain- this one could be taken off right? after all i've had it on my key ring for the past 4 years and it really is tattered, torn, and very worn out looking. then i realized why it was worn out looking- because i have taken this keychain with me everywhere for the past four years of my life- my college life to be exact. everything i have endured- good times, bad times, in-between times- through these past four years this tiny pink shoe has been there for. maybe this is why it looks so worn.
-i decided to make a list- you all know how i love lists! this list is a list of things i have gone through- things that have been tough, others that have been joyous and beautiful. there have been paths that were ended and new ones found. all throughout these four years i never realized just how much has happened to me. so here it is.
- i remember the first day i got this little pink shoe. it was my freshman year of college when i first started dancing. one of my closest friends cara gave this to me as a present for christmas. she told me she knew i loved the color pink and that she knew i loved to dance- and so did she, so naturally it was the perfect gift. i put that shoe on my key ring that very day and haven't taken it off once to this day.
- that same year i began swing dancing- it was a wonderful way to open up the real me. i was finally growing into my own- i was personable, outspoken, crazy, funny, and for the first time in my life i truly felt beautiful- all because of my dancing. i met a lot of wonderful people and finally felt like i had found my niche.
- freshman year was coming to a close, i applied to be an RA in my college dorms and was accepted- i couldn't believe how well things were going for me- my life seemed to be coming together just in the way i had imagined. i felt like college had taken me under it's wing and given me everything i ever wanted. i ended my freshman year with a 3.9 GPA, amazing new friends, and a boyfriend who was everything i ever wanted- i was sure that time was coming that he would propose- i felt like my life was all planned out- everything was set- there was a plan and all i needed to do was follow along.
- the summer before my sophomore year my boyfriend told me he was going to be studying abroad in China for a semester. I was upset but i understood- we had been far apart throughout our whole time in college- he was in New York, i was here in Wisconsin. We had always made it work- long distance is not easy, but somehow i knew it was for the best. he set off for China and i set off for college- my new RA job and a brand new year. the moment i stepped into my room new room i just knew things were going to be different this year and i was ready for anything life had to throw at me.
-my RA room sophomore year overlooked the woods to the back of Mount Mary College- the sun would rise and set and it was the most beautiful thing i have ever seen. Every morning i would wake up and feel the warmth of that sky- no matter if it was raining, snowing, sleeting or sunny- i could feel it. i went to bed underneath that sky every night- the sky felt like it went on forever outside my window- to me the sky meant possibility and growth- it truly was amazing. my RA job was going great- my residents loved me and i finally felt like i was playing a vital role in the lives of people- something i have wanted to do all my life.
- it was halfway into sophomore year that i realized your "plan" doesn't always go the way you think it will. in fact sometimes having a plan when your that young isn't always the smartest thing to do. my boyfriend called me from China and told me that he was going to be spending a year in China instead of a semester and that he wanted to take this time to be apart- it would be good for us he told me. i remember the silence that resided on both of our ends- i choked back tears of anger, sadness, guilt and denial. how could he do this? didn't he know we had a plan? i spent that day crying more then i ever have in my life- i never realized how much pain one person could feel all at once. my emotions over took me- i felt like nothing would ever make sense again. i think i stayed in my room for about a week- contemplating a way to get him back- i would do anything- even move to China- a story i laugh about now but was very real to me then.
- i needed a distraction- and that is exactly what i got. i tried to make new friends- which i did. i pushed away everyone i ever cared about up to that point- who needs them anyways? i didn't need any reminders of him- i needed to escape. i needed a new life, new identity, a new way of living- and that is exactly what i found. i turned into a college party fiend- every night that there was a party- i was there. there were many mornings spent praising the porcelain goddess back in my dorm room, hoping no one would notice i was hung over from some serious partying the night before. i didn't know it then but i do know now- that wasn't me- it wasn't who i really wanted to be, but it was who i needed to be- at that time, in that place. if i hadn't gone through that i wouldn't be where i am now- i firmly believe that a rocky road will always lead you to a better place- i was about to find that place.
- after much suffering in both my personal life as well as my academic life i decided i needed to change. i took my dancing back up again- i missed it so much. i can't tell you how good it felt to put on those shoes again for the first time- it was as if they were meant for me- the way they hugged my feet made me feel secure again- as if they were telling me "welcome back, we knew you'd come around" this is when i met D- i had known him before this time but it felt so brand new to me. it was a clean slate and i welcomed him aboard- for better or worse. i warned him him not to get close- "it's too soon, i'm no good for you" type of warning- but as you all know he didn't listen.
- a month after we began dating i moved out of the dorms. my heart just wasn't in it anymore- i had lost the trust of a lot of people and i wanted to regain myself before i attempted to be there for anyone else. it was one of the hardest moves i have ever had to make- i would miss all of my friends- the people i had known for so long. D asked me to move in with him- i was unsure at first- i had never lived with a boyfriend before- putting all of our stuff together just seemed so permanent- what if things went wrong again? what if this plan also failed? i made a leap of faith however, which i am feel i do often- which is sometimes good, and sometimes bad- but it turned out to be one of the best leaps i ever made!
www.mthreestudio.com
-fast forward 3 months- D proposed to me on November 19th 2005! I was on the moon, head over heals in love! it couldn't have been a better time, we were planning our wedding in no time- well ok we were kind of lazy about the whole planning thing in the beginning- but we finally set a date- August 11th, 2007. shortly after that we moved to milwaukee, D got a new job as a car salesman and i got a job as a medical biller. we were in love and finally moving into our first apartment together- it was small, money was tight, but we made it happen. we were saving, saving, saving for the wedding of our dreams!
www.mthreestudio.com
- finally, our day was here! we were so in love that day- i am so glad i got the whole thing on video because otherwise i would have missed a lot! i love this picture. it is one of the ones i have not yet shared on my blog- so i thought i would show you guys how much fun we had with the timeless and classic garter toss.the moment i walked down the isle and saw D's face i realized all along he was the man i was supposed to spend the rest of my life with. i truly believe in soul mates- there is that one person out there for everyone- at that moment i felt like i had found mine- that this was real, it was all coming true. it was the best moment of my life- the wedding of course- not just the garter toss :0)
i realized today that this shoe has been through a lot. a few posts back i wrote about how i do all of my best thinking in the car- all of my thoughts, feelings, emotions are embedded into that car! whoever gets it next better take care of it- it has put up with me since i was 15! kind of like the little pink shoe on my key chain. i never realized until today just how much that charm means to me. it may look ratted and torn- worn out and lifeless. sure the color may be faded and the rubber on the bottom smooth from me nervously rubbing it- but that's what makes it so great!!!! it carries my memories, the good and the bad, my roller coaster of a life- all wrapped up in a tiny pink shoe. i promised myself today that i would never get rid of that pink shoe- it will stay with me forever, and even when it can no longer reside on my key chain because the leather is so worn and it finally gives way- it will still be with me- maybe not on my key chain but in my mind.
i hope that all of you have something like this- something that you have taken with you through the years, something that has grown with you, been there for it all. if you have it tucked away take it out- think about where it has been, where you have been, and where you are now. small things do really bring great things- this shoe has taught me a lot.
sorry for the abscence
sorry everyone i will be on later to write a long post- lots of things on my mind lately- good things in fact so i will post all about it soon!
hope all is well with everyone! i have been commenting on all of your blogs- but am a bad blogger- school has gotten the best of me!
i have a 10 page paper looming- it truly is the paper of doom
check back for more tomorrow!
hope all is well with everyone! i have been commenting on all of your blogs- but am a bad blogger- school has gotten the best of me!
i have a 10 page paper looming- it truly is the paper of doom
check back for more tomorrow!
Monday, March 31, 2008
the first day back and i am the chicken....
so today was a little hectic.... okay a lot of hectic! it seemed liked i had absolutely no time to breath- no time to do anything for that matter! the day went by quickly though which was nice because seeing as it was the first day back in classes i had no desire to be there- does anyone really want to go back after a nice relaxing break?
if you are rational the answer is no...... :0)
so i started the day off late- D wakes up for work at about 7:45 because he works at 8:30- i asked him to kindly wake me up at 8:10 but that didn't happen- and why didn't it happen? because my hubby is a freak of nature- he truly spends longer in the shower than i do- at least 30 minutes if not more.... i'm totally serious- it's completely alien to me- what guy spends 30 or more minutes in the shower? so this is why i got woken up at 8:29 instead of 8:10- that would normally be fine except for the fact i have class at 9:00 on Mon and Wed.
so i jumped out of bed... skipped the nice relaxing hot shower and jumped in my car making it to school with plenty of time to spare!!!!!
that is what i SHOULD have done, and in a perfect world i probably would have....
instead i decided to lay in bed another 10 minutes- then if that weren't bad enough i decided i absolutely needed a shower- it would relax me for my first day- and after all the shower is truly what was going to make or break my day so i went for it. i rolled into class at promptly 9:25- fashionably late right?
hmmmmmm wrong...... i didn't realize we had all of our samples for our dye unit due on wednesday.... this wednesday..... so i ran around the room like a chicken with my head caught off- until my good friend erin told me that i needed to relax- which is very true- getting all high strung and crazy over some dumb fabric really isn't worth it- a good friend always knows when to tell you to chill out- and i definately needed to chill
so then i went to the cafeteria- hubby had called so i called him back- and what a sweetheart, he called just to see how my first day back was going- these are the little things that make my husband so great- hearing his voice instantly put me in a much, much, better state of mind- i grabbed a tasty lunch of salad and a awesome veggie wrap and went to my next class- history of psych, which i was completely and totally prepared for :0) at least that's what i thought....
i took a quick peak at the syllabus and realized that i have a rough draft of my 10 page paper due next week... which i haven't even started- nor do i have all of my resources yet. why do i procrastinate? the least i could do is have my resources ya know? so now i will be spending a good majority of my weekend writing my paper- or at least a couple of pages to show her i have something- i am lucky because my teacher is pretty cool- she allowed me to hand in my outline later because i was having computer troubles- which really saved me because she is grading the paper as we go along- meaning the topic we handed in is worth 5 points, the outline is worth another 10- so if you don't hand something in along the way those points are automatically deducted from the final grade- i was totally thankful- how often is it that you get a professor that is understanding? not often at my school so i was pretty happy.
after that class i went to my art therapy internship class- and realized i had to present today- and i had not read. i didn't intentionally forget that i had to present the chapter i just forgot due to my fantastically lazy spring break. so i completely faked it.... and it worked! i don't like to do that- especially when i am going to present- i may not read everything that is assigned in my classes but if i am going to present i make it a point to read- especially because i feel like i presenting the material which is very important to not only my learning but the other students in my class. but all was well- no major slip-ups and i came out of it looking prepared which was a good thing.
so then it was time for work.... this is the only thing i have to say about that...
yea..... i hate websense..... i feel like they should change the name to web-no-sense.... okay my jokes are lame, but i am serious people! every time i try to access a site it is blocked by websense..... why? does work really need to suck the life and the fun we are supposed to have in this life out of everything???!?!?!?!
the answer is yes..... i know this but i still love to complain....
well hubby has made dinner and here i sit on my blog so i should go eat with him- is it just me or do you guys get entirely too wrapped up in your blogs as well? sometimes i don't even realize how long i've been on here!
maybe i'll just send him this card......
except i do have a blog.... and i do write pleasant things- so you see this card is 100% true! absolutely the right card for hubby :0)
if you are rational the answer is no...... :0)
so i started the day off late- D wakes up for work at about 7:45 because he works at 8:30- i asked him to kindly wake me up at 8:10 but that didn't happen- and why didn't it happen? because my hubby is a freak of nature- he truly spends longer in the shower than i do- at least 30 minutes if not more.... i'm totally serious- it's completely alien to me- what guy spends 30 or more minutes in the shower? so this is why i got woken up at 8:29 instead of 8:10- that would normally be fine except for the fact i have class at 9:00 on Mon and Wed.
so i jumped out of bed... skipped the nice relaxing hot shower and jumped in my car making it to school with plenty of time to spare!!!!!
that is what i SHOULD have done, and in a perfect world i probably would have....
instead i decided to lay in bed another 10 minutes- then if that weren't bad enough i decided i absolutely needed a shower- it would relax me for my first day- and after all the shower is truly what was going to make or break my day so i went for it. i rolled into class at promptly 9:25- fashionably late right?
hmmmmmm wrong...... i didn't realize we had all of our samples for our dye unit due on wednesday.... this wednesday..... so i ran around the room like a chicken with my head caught off- until my good friend erin told me that i needed to relax- which is very true- getting all high strung and crazy over some dumb fabric really isn't worth it- a good friend always knows when to tell you to chill out- and i definately needed to chill
so then i went to the cafeteria- hubby had called so i called him back- and what a sweetheart, he called just to see how my first day back was going- these are the little things that make my husband so great- hearing his voice instantly put me in a much, much, better state of mind- i grabbed a tasty lunch of salad and a awesome veggie wrap and went to my next class- history of psych, which i was completely and totally prepared for :0) at least that's what i thought....
i took a quick peak at the syllabus and realized that i have a rough draft of my 10 page paper due next week... which i haven't even started- nor do i have all of my resources yet. why do i procrastinate? the least i could do is have my resources ya know? so now i will be spending a good majority of my weekend writing my paper- or at least a couple of pages to show her i have something- i am lucky because my teacher is pretty cool- she allowed me to hand in my outline later because i was having computer troubles- which really saved me because she is grading the paper as we go along- meaning the topic we handed in is worth 5 points, the outline is worth another 10- so if you don't hand something in along the way those points are automatically deducted from the final grade- i was totally thankful- how often is it that you get a professor that is understanding? not often at my school so i was pretty happy.
after that class i went to my art therapy internship class- and realized i had to present today- and i had not read. i didn't intentionally forget that i had to present the chapter i just forgot due to my fantastically lazy spring break. so i completely faked it.... and it worked! i don't like to do that- especially when i am going to present- i may not read everything that is assigned in my classes but if i am going to present i make it a point to read- especially because i feel like i presenting the material which is very important to not only my learning but the other students in my class. but all was well- no major slip-ups and i came out of it looking prepared which was a good thing.
so then it was time for work.... this is the only thing i have to say about that...
yea..... i hate websense..... i feel like they should change the name to web-no-sense.... okay my jokes are lame, but i am serious people! every time i try to access a site it is blocked by websense..... why? does work really need to suck the life and the fun we are supposed to have in this life out of everything???!?!?!?!
the answer is yes..... i know this but i still love to complain....
well hubby has made dinner and here i sit on my blog so i should go eat with him- is it just me or do you guys get entirely too wrapped up in your blogs as well? sometimes i don't even realize how long i've been on here!
maybe i'll just send him this card......
except i do have a blog.... and i do write pleasant things- so you see this card is 100% true! absolutely the right card for hubby :0)
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